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ZZR vs ZXR vs SLR vs VTR vs GSX etc

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by Dazza, May 7, 2005.

  1. Just wanting to know, which is the better bike and what tyres do you reckon are the best and who is a good bike place to buy from and who is a good mechanic and what oil should I use, Synthetic or normal and should I buy aftermarket pipes and which pipe is a good pipe and how should I protect my chain and what lubricants do you use and found to be the best. Should I have a glass of milk before I go to bed, will scary movies keep me up all night.

    Cheers 8)
  2. Hmmmmm. Thought long and hard about this one.

    Red, I think.

    Glad I could help.
  3. 1. Anything but a ZX12
    2. Round ones
    3. Peter stevens (see matt232 he'll look after you)
    4. Bob Buttcrack
    5. Peanut
    6. bagpipes
    7. leave it padlocked on the Zx12 in the gararge
    8(a). KY Gel
    8(b). KY Gel and a little deep heat
    9. 2 serapax and a glass of scotch
    10. If its p0rn it will

    I hope this helped :wink: :LOL:
  4. *42*.......nuff said 8)
  5. gee there r women passing through the forum too big fella


    nice replys though;)
  6. yeah, definately 42.....
  7. Coconut and lodger: I can see where you're coming from with the 42 theory, but at the risk of being a pedant, I don't think you fully understood the original query.

    Red is correct, and I'm prepared to fight anyone who disagrees.

    Except perhaps for my wife.

    Or big blokes.
  8. reply

    Ah--- 42 may not be correct. :roll:
    When the super computer returned that answer, it was asked to go back and reconsider. :)

    As yet I am not aware that it has replied, so the answer 42 may or may not be correct.

  9. The best bike is a real fast one. As a new rider it is critical to have the fastest machine that your restrictions will allow. You will only learn good riding skills by exceeding your own skill levels and trying things that the bike was not designed to do or is just not capable of.

    I'd go the Dunlop Volley tyres. Good and cheap, not always a good fit but economical and after all they are just tyres, what diference do good tyres really make anyway.

    I've got a mate called Thommo. He always seems to be selling his bikes real cheap, in fact they are always the same price. He's got a real neat yellow/purple GPX at the moment with kick ass pipes. This sounds familiar but can't figure out why.

    Don't worry about using a mechanic. Bikes are real simple to work on any as long as you've got the original toolkit and a 3lb mallet you can fix anything.

    Cooking oil is best in the engine (preferably extra virgin olive oil). It's a nice golden colour, comes in large tins and is pretty cheap. This stuff must be good as you are prepared to eat stuff boiled in it.

    Definately get some pipes at a market, speak to the bloke after they close. They are cheaper. Don't expect a receipt.

    Just make sure no one yanks your chain. This will do the greatest damage.

    Lubricants, dont get me started.. A good all purpose lubricant is chicken fat. The bonus here is when it comes time to apply again, just let your dog lick it clean first.

    I'd skip on the glass of milk unless it was low fat. Try Rev if you have to.

    Scary movies can make you a bit more anxious when it gets dark, cold and wet but as you are never likely to ride your bike in any of these conditions you shouldn't have any problems with scary movies.

    Hope this helps, good luck with your riding
  10. ZZR vs ZXR vs SLR vs VTR vs GSX etc???
    are we talking 250 style
    or unlimited versions..???
    there is a hell of a difference between a VTR250 and a 1000

    and what do you wanna use the bike for..?
    round town, commuting, sports bike style, Reefton runs
    track days????
    a ZZR1200 is a blast going to Adelaide
    but its a handful commuting
    A GSXR1000 would be fun at PI or Reefton
    but not comfy going to Sydney

    some more info would ne good

  11. Wow dazza, you only caught one fish!
  12. For a bike to go fast, needs to end with a "R" (for race). I would also suggest a red racing stripe.

    Any "light" oil should be used, except the fork oil, so that the front wheel stays on the ground. You should buy from who ever is selling the bike the cheapest. And as "ashes" said, a mallet will help fix most things on a bike.
    Ford gyron history
  13. Sorry, but I disagree with the comment about heavy oil for the forks. You actually want a light oil as the steering will feel heavy if you put a heavy oil in.
    btw. how the hell could you feel qualified to make such a statement on the strength of 28 posts to this point when I am obviously more knowledgable with over 260 posts!!!
  14. yeah well, i have close to 800 posts and i say that the CB250 is the most exciting bike ever made. and with 800 posts, i'm well qualified to say such a thing, in fact its almost gospel with a count like that! if matt232 was to back me up, it might aswell be written in the bible. the 11th commandment:

    "thoust shalt be aroused by thy CB250 for all eternity"

    word :D
  15. Dazza what capacity are you talking about, is it litre bikes your talking about?
  16. Nah mate, make that two now

    Cheers 8)
  17. Ur the best fisherman on here Dazza , keep up the good work . Always brings a smile to my face.
  18. Yeah sorry. Good point, with over 800 posts you have 3 times the knowledge and experience that I have.
    The CB250 is the 2nd greatest bike ever built (1st is the Across). As you know the addition of a NOS kit and supercharger on the CB250 (aka CB250RS ) quadruples its output and still keeps the bike under the 260cc capacity restriction for learners. The only thing it is then missing is a helmet holder.
  19. I reckon you should bolt the GPX and VTR motors together in an opposed manner so youd have a flat X4. Then take the forks from the GSXR, and tank from the CBR, bolt it to a Virago frame then the tail from an RS. Put ZZR fairings on it with ZXR rear shock and a wheel barrow wheel out back. Then youd have to sleeve the motors back down to a 250cc capacity, else it would be illegal, and quite frankly far to powerful and difficult to ride for a learner.

    The result would be a Honahazuaki GPCXVXXXGRR500/2RRW "wheelie". It'd bloody fly!! And paint it grey and tell everyone you had to import it from Uzebekistan, then it'd be really hard to insure, unless you have a disc lock for the gudgeon pin.

    Then after all that, never ride it. Instead spend all day online posting inane things about motorcycles that, quite frankly, you have absolutely no idea about!!
  20. The BEST thing about this thread were the VERY clever comments.


    Cheers 8)