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you know your a real FEMALE rider when...........

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by f4ibike, Nov 20, 2006.

  1. you know you are a REAL Female Rider when---->

    1. You have broken a nail on your clutch or front brake

    2. The only perfume you smell like is "eau de exhuast"

    3. Nearly all of your shoes have shifter marks on them

    4. You don't bother putting on makeup before riding

    5. You take the "windswept" and "helmet" hair look to a level never seen before

    6. You have spent hours trying to untangle your hair after a long day of riding

    7. You have tan lines on your wrists from wearing your short stunt riding gloves, ( :roll:you have tan lines on ya back from hipster jeans)

    8. You have had mascara in your eyes because you were riding so fast.

    9. You have rode up to a restaurant or bar and had to go pick bugs off your face before you could go hang out with your friends.

    10. You have had to pull over to re-adjust your hipster jeans cause your crack was showing.

    11. You have rode past a cop at over 100km/hr an hour and gotten off with a wave and smile :twisted:

    12. You have ripped out your earings putting your helmet on or taking it off

    13. You would rather ride your bike than your boyfriend (OUCH but had to say it-- sorry :oops:)

    14. You organise your life around MotoGP and SuperBike race events

    15. You are on a first name basis with the motorbike police officers

    16. You stopped wearing sandals or thongs cause there may be a chance you will be going riding

    17. You have forgotten what heels are---- ah not me sorry!!)

    18. You would rather have clothes from icon, alpinestars, joe rocket, dainese, than gucci, prada, or valentino

    19. You are driving your car-- COS YOU 100% HAVE TO-- and think about whether you can fit into that space to lane split

    20. You have been pulled over by police, cause they thought you were a guy for riding so fast and dangerous past them

    21. You shop more at the motorbike dealerships than you do at the shopping centre

    22. Your preferred method for straightening your hair before a night out is a two hour ride beforehand with your hair tied up and tucked under your helmet

    23. You have scratches on your tank from your belt -even with a tank protector

    24. You care more about the current gearing ratio on your bike than the current fashion

    25. You know that a Power Commander is not a sex toy nor a video game

    26. You adjust what your wearing according to where you are going riding, the last time you wore a dress was ...... hardly ever!!!

    27. You mix it up with the boys on the track, on the road and in undisclosed stunt locations and love to show them that female riders rock

    28. You rather get your knee down than have ya boyfriend get down on his knee

    29. You would rather talk about fuel injected vs carbureted, than clothes or shoes

    30. You have asked your boyfriend/husband/friends for parts and accesories for your bike instead of jewlery/or other presents

  2. Most of them :oops: I had most of my hair cut off cos of the knots :)

    not the broken nail stuff, or bugs on face, stunting, riding crazy or wearing jeans.

    But the bit about riding the bike instead of the boyfriend.. have you been talking to my ex? :LOL:
  3. You know you're a female rider when...

    - you have replaced the tools in the bike boot with lipstick, a foundation kit, and tampons.

    - your side mirros are angled so you can see both sides of your gorgeous face at a glance... my that helmet looks fantastic. I totally bought the right one. I hope there isn't a policeman behind me.

    - you wake the family up for work/school by revving the bike instead of going around ripping blankets off and screaming at people [I love you anyway, mum!].

    - you have ever asked any motorcycle apparel outlet "Does this come in pink?"

    - you grab a basket at Woolies and split between all the people with trolleys.

    - TigerAngel have made maternity leathers for you.

    - you buy Draggins 2 sizes too small because they're on special and tell yourself "I'll fit into them oneday" :p
    • Like Like x 1
  4. You been talking to my ex too? :LOL: :LOL:

    Yeah, quite a few of those apply.

    All my 'good' shoes live at work... am always in bike boots on the weekends :)

  5. :LOL: Ktulu you're a funny bastard.
  6. When your friend mentions Prada and you think shes making the sound of the latest Ducati (Prada, Prada, Prada).

    When you boy friend mentions a proposal and you hope he means he's proposing a new bike for you.

    When your ex calls you a biatch and your proud of the fact :)

    When you boy friend asks you to pick up some rubbers on the way home and you turn up with new tyres for your bike (and you wonder why he's pissed off LOL)

    When you find yourself atracted to a guy 'cause he rides a realy nice bike (VFR800, yellow of course) :)

  7. Absolutely priceless Woodsy :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: .. I nearly fell off the chair from laughing when I read that.

    I think Im going to have to steal that one for my sig.
  9. My pleasure chicky, it's scary where my mind wonders on a slow day at work :)
  10. Any new tops you buy for work are non-crushable, so they can be worn under your leather jacket :grin:
  11. +1 everything Ktulu and Woodsy said.
    LMAO :rofl:
  12. oh my god - that is so me :p
    (and a lot of the other things aswell)
  13. Hi tanyathecheeky,

    "female riders rock"

    I whole heartedly agree,
    and there should be more girls / ladies that ride bikes,
    more female riders I say.
    :grin: :) :grin:

  14. When you go to the newsagents to buy Cleo/Cosmo & AMCN.
  15. You try to Torque your boyfriend for better performance
  16. ummmmm what's a "dress"???????????