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work stories

Discussion in 'General Motorcycling Discussion' started by cosi, Sep 6, 2005.

  1. After my walkie stacker into the roller door story i noticed a few other stories people had and was wondering what other whack/funny/ interesting things people have done at work. ( i know everyone is very busy at work, esp me. )

    when i started my first job at safeway i had a few spare minutes of my shift at night and decided to get some trolleys from the carpark which is on an angle leaning down to the entrance. well.. when trying to push all 10 trolleys on an angle with cars on either side of me the front 5 let loose "OH SHIT" was my reaction.. a spare carpark was on the right of the parked car so i pushed the 5 i still had as far over as i could and reached for the other 5 spiralling out of control.

    the 5 i pushed seemed like they were goign to tap the gutter when all of the sudden their angle changed towards one of the cars.. all i could do was watch and hope.. then slowly the trolleys scrapede up the side of the car.. "hmmm.." *ding* went the entrance doors "DID THAT JUST HIT M CAR" yelled the woman
    "YOUR CAR?" i questioned "i dont know.." i tried to squirm

    kneeling down to inspect the damage.. "hmm yeah.. well.. hmm.. seems like it did hey.."

    well i didnt get in trouble and they got it sorted out with the duty manager, but i had to sneak out because they were still there at the end of my shift :p

  2. well this one time I actually went to work!!! (i get to choose if/when/where i work so normally work only one day a week.)

    I have lots of stories about working for rivers. And some funny ones about working with my brother in law (which i never told my boyfriend of the time about :LOL:). but my dreams are funnier so ill post them instead :p
  3. A friend of mine back in the late 1970's managed what I think is an all time record for the length of time between starting and getting sacked.

    He started work in a warehouse in Melbourne and got asked to move some pallets with a fork-lift. (He'd never actually driven one before :roll: )

    Came down a ramp and put the forklift through the front of the Chairman's 3 week old Mercedes. :twisted:

    Total time on the job - 15 minutes...
    :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:
  4. haha tony.. oh god :D
  5. bwahahaha that's hilarious tony :LOL:
  6. I once worked as a labourer at the Perfumerie Fragonard in Grasse France where they make Chanel perfume. It cost about $200 for a few mils and we used to roll it round in 200ltr drums. With a bit of oil added it makes a Suzuki GT250 go like a scalded cat.
  7. That would have to make it the best smelling Suzuki ever...
    :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:
  8. Wel I am a youth worker so I have had some pretty funny things happen and some not funny things happen as well..

    Here's one that happened a few months ago..

    We pick up a young person in our van.. Needed to be taken home (this young person is in and out of jail a lot etc etc)

    Anyway he says I just wanna go to the shop and get a pack of ciggies.. We go yea ok.. We will wait in the car....

    A few mins later he comes out with some ciggies and two bottles of grog..

    We go oh ya gonna have a few drinks tonight.. He says yeah yeah..

    ( I was thinking gee thats a bit weird he shouldn't have that much money on him as it isnt pay day)

    Anyway we get almost to his house and the cops are behind us with lights on etc etc..

    Yeah whats wrong officer I don't think I was speeding.. Nah um you guys just held up the bottle O a few mins ago :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

    Um No we didnt.......!!!!

    Anyway the young person held up the bottle shop while we drove him there and home LOL..

    He's on a few more charges and in the shits with us as well..

    We didn't get in trouble from the cops they thought it was funny as well..

    Anyway there is one of my stories

  9. Tony's Merc yarn, and Lisa's "getaway car" story, total crack-ups, thanks folks!!!
  10. ROFL :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

    When my wife was working in a youth refuge she had some gems - not quite that good though...

    A long standing result of that job was her acquiring a vocabulary that would shock a Hells Angel :LOL: and a lifelong aversion to Apricot Chicken.

    Every kid that came through the place would at some stage want to show off their cooking skills...

    For some reason known only to domestic science teachers the one dish they'd all learned to cook was ....."Apricot Chicken".

    There was one week where she had it five nights in succession. :x :x

    Then there was the time she was doing the sleepover shift one night when she was awakened by the pitter patter of not so tiny feet going from the girls room to the boys room. (Victoria learned to be a very light sleeper in that job :LOL: )

    She got out of bed, put a dressing gown on, wandered down the hall and ordered the young lady back to her own bed. (In all it was less than two minutes from hearing the the footsteps.)

    She was met with a very surly response - "Oh all right - anyway, you're too fu*king late - we've finished"...

    :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

  11. I once had to wrestle a jack hammer from the clutches of a 16 yr old while the thing was turned on. Workcover would have had a fit if they'd seen it. :LOL:

    Note: I'm a special ed teacher. This is only a sample of my stories but most arn't suitable for a public forum.
  12. In germany we used to drink beer while on duty : )
    It was especially fun when some one had a birthday, because they'd always shout a case or two.
  13. Tony and Lisa and Incitatus, you guys rock!

    What amazing stories.

    After that mine's going to seem very tame. Riding across the paddock between my school and the local fish and chip shop at lunch time on a borrowed Suzuki TS100 trailey.

    Didn't know that, in the dipper just before the shop parking lot they had put up a 3 strand 8 guage fencing wire fence.

    Hit it in 4th doing about 35k's. Bike/rider/fence/bike/rider/fence......DAMN!!!!

    Gathered up what remained of my pride, dusted myself off and went and bought the fish and chippies.

    BUT, I had binned it in full view of most of the school population who were standing in the playground watching my "performance" Rode QUIETLY back to school only to have 450 primary school kids gather around me in the car park asking if I was OK and could I do it again!
  14. My Wife was a nurses aid looking after oldies with dementure. When on a late shift she heard the rattling of a hospital bed rail. She entered the room, and there was an old fella going like hell having a solo session. She promptly turned around and said that she would come back when he had finished. The old fella then piped up with "Come on love hop on. hop on, it wont take long" :LOL:
  15. Some strange things happened to me but the one that stands out was while I was linesman there was a storma nd this line was out. I and my offsider had to walk across the paddocks looking for where the wires were down.
    It was a very dark night but every now and then the moon broke out and we could see enough to keep walking.

    After several fences we heard a snort behind us. We stopped and turned our torches on, they were off to conserve the batteries, there was the biggest bull you have ever seen. Head half way down and pawing and snorting.
    I went one way and my offsider went another way. I never knew I could dive through a fence and not touch the wires.

    I found my way back to the truck and waited for the other bloke. After a fair while He hadnt returned so I drove around to the next road which was about 3 k away. There was my offsider standing on the road. Turned out he ran so fast he didnt notice he had gone through 3 fences on the way to the road. Was funny then but not while the running was on.
  16. Ok - not sure about the ethics of telling this story. If any of the people involved ended up being Netriders, then I guess I didn't do my job.

    Before qualifying as a social worker, I also worked in a refuge. I'd do sleepovers on the weekends. Two young women absconded and came back a week later, both pregnant.

    "Normalisation" was all the rage, so they had to go to parenting and maternity classes at the local hospital. Naturally, they needed to be accompanied by someone who could, conceivably (so to speak) pass as the father. Guess who?

    So, for 8 long weeks, I accompanied two pregnant teenagers to class. Every bloke in the room looked at me with an envious eye - every woman was ready to kill me.
  17. Working at a pool one day, had these 2 suspect twin brothers come in..told them a fe times to put their cigarettes out and go outside etc..each time they did and have a whinge etc..

    anyway these guys are in the 60's and i notice there swimming a little too close to children, and swimming into the lanes infront of female swimmers..

    anyway my duty manager walked past them near these younger (5-8 years) girls and they were saying something to the girls like "no dont let me, its ok, dont tell the lifeguard"...that was it, we sent them packing and called the police..[/url]
  18. not so much as doing something stupid on the job as doing something stupid to get a job..... I bloody enlisted in the RAAF..... me and my trusty biro protected you bastards from the invading enemy for 14 yrs.......
    I learnt how to fire a big rifle at wooden people who didn't fire back, how to drink all night and wake up sober (thanks to the medical orderlies bag of tricks), how to survive in the jungle homebug scrub in SA with only 3 mess tents and around 10 slabs to last 30 blokes 2 weeks, and I also learnt how to salute assholes I didn't like......
    along the way I made friends I still have, and learnt one very valuable lesson, "Tequila is the devil"