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Why Dogs Are Better Than Women.

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by pvda, Jul 8, 2005.

  1. Found and stolen from the mcnews forums

    Dogs don't cry.

    Dogs love it when your mates come over.

    Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.

    Dogs think you sing great.

    Dogs are only in the bathroom long enough to get a quick drink.

    Dogs don't expect you to call if you are running late.

    The later you are , the more excited dogs are to see you.

    Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.

    Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dogs name.

    Dogs are excited by rough play.

    Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.

    Dogs understand that farts are funny.

    Dogs love red meat.

    Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.

    Anyone can get a good looking dog.

    If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.

    Dogs don't shop.

    Dogs like it when you leave lot's of things on the floor.

    A dogs deposition stays the same all month long.

    Dogs never need to examine your relationship.

    A dogs parents never visit.

    Dogs love long car trips.

    Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.

    Dogs know that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.

    If a dog gets old and starts to snap at you constantly, you can shoot it.

    Dogs like beer.

    Dogs don't hate their bodies.

    Dogs never buy Kenny G or Michael Bolton albums.

    Dogs never put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.

    Dogs never criticise.

    Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

    Dogs never expect gifts.

    It is legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.

    Dogs don't worry about germs.

    Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.

    Dogs like to do their snooping outside, not in your wallet, your pockets or your sock drawer.

    Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.

    A dog would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a lobster one.

    You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.

    Dogs have no use for flowers, cards or jewellery.

    Dogs don't borrow your shirts.

    Dogs never want foot rubs.

    Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.

    Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

    Dogs can't talk.

    Dogs aren't catty.

    Dogs seldom outlive you.
  2. nnniiiccceeee.......
  3. Yeah, but women don't dig up your back yard, tear your washing off the line and destroy it, chase passing cars or get fleas and smell awful (at least none that I've known, anyway)
    And while a dog can sleep on your bed at night, nothing beats having someone sleeping IN your bed at night.
  4. You can call a dog a biatch and not get slapped.
  5. Mmmm, he does have a point there.