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What's your best practical joke?

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by Untame_me, May 3, 2005.

  1. I'm bored. So I'm starting a new thread.

    I'm interested to know:
    1) Are you a practical joker?
    2) What is your best practical joke that you've played on somebody?

    I'm the eldest of four siblings, I've been hiding behind doors and corners...and behind the couch...and under the doona..... for the purpose of scaring the hell out of my siblings for decades.

    hhmm...I think one April Fool's eve, I stayed up at night until my brother went to sleep, I nail polished all his 10 fingers... :LOL: :LOL:



    This would've been good if I persisted....I was living in Darwin, my sister in Melb and brother in Syd....I told each of them that I'm looking into getting comestic surgery, and I requested for them to ring a number to do some enquiries for me...and I gave them a brothel's number....I was on a practical-joke-high for weeks, anticipating the best laugh...but they are so slack, they didn't carry through.

    My latest practical joke https://netrider.net.au/forums/viewtopic.php?p=80550#80550

    Any other ideas? hehehehehehehe
     
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  2. My favorite (and it probably could be translated to motorcycling) was watching a hang-gliding veteran walk up to a new pilot on the launch at Mt Buffalo near Bright (this is a 3000 foot sheer cliff). After the young bloke had got himself ready, taken a few deep breaths and mentally prepared himself, the old bloke squinted down the inside of the wing and asked "Normally fly with it like that, do you? Fair enough" and then walked away.

    I've never seen anyone go to pieces quite so quickly. A b@stard's act, but priceless to watch.
     
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  3. i can't say i'm a practical joker, but i've had a bad one played on me. it was a sports tour and after two weeks of partying hard, i was feeling it. unluckily, i fell asleep early, fully clothed and right in the middle of the loungeroom sorta thing. so this guy decides it would be funny to shave off one of my eyebrows and see how long it took me to notice. since i wasn't in the most comfortable sleeping position and i was moving around a bit, they only got halfway before i woke up. try as they might, they couldn't really surpress the laughter and with a guy holding a camera in my face and eyebrow hair on my face it was kinda obvious. so i played along for a while until they went to sleep, then did the old, shaving cream on the hand and tickle the face one to the guy. he got off lightly considering i had to walk around and be asked what happened to your eyebrow for almost three weeks. damn that was annoying.
     
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  4. I don't have one of my own, but the best one I've ever seen is a two wheeled motor vehicle labled a suz......a suzu....oh you know :p
     
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  5. Doesn't count. A suzuki is an impractical joke.
     
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  6. mine was on a friday night working late, i but on this trench coat type thing, rolled my trousers up and my collar back, so you couldnt see any clothes under the trench coat. walked up to her whilst she was on the phone, and flung up the coat. she screamed, it was great, and i still had my clothes on :p
     
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  7. Not really a practical joke, but a true story.......

    Returning on the Cross-Channel ferry from Le Mans a few years back (and too poor to afford a cabin), I had a few beers and fell asleep under a table in a dark and deserted restaurant. My GSXR had an open race-pipe so I was in the habit of wearing ear-plugs, particularly as the ride from the track to the ferry had been fairly, errr, rapid. As the ferry was pretty noisy (it was night, but full of pissed bikers) I used the ear plugs to cut the racket and fell into a deep and well-deserved sleep. I wake in the morning to absolute silence....... belch, fart, stretch, scratch my arse etc......then slowly open my eyes to find myself lying in the middle of a busy restaurant serving several hundred people breakfast. OK, now try walking away with any dignity..................
     
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  8. When I was 14 in yr8 at school there was this guy who thought he was really great, even though he was nothing special but he had a fair few mates in our class who he hung out with at lunch etc. This guys locker was next to mine so I decided to write him a love letter with love hearts and stuff and coat them in my mums perfume and post them through the vent in his locker. Anyway the next day when the bell went we go to our lockers to get our books out and through the corner of my eye i see the letter fall out of his locker as he opens it, and then he picks it up and opens it..lol. This went on for a few more days with the letters becoming more and more explicit on my sexual desires for him..lol. He had no clues who it was and in those days you wouldn't even contemplate a guy do a thing like that but still not rule it out completely. So, one day when the teacher was late for class, him and all his mates started checking all the chicks handwriting in our class and my writing seemed to match this really ugly class germ, with big tits, and they all started abusing her in class and verbally attacking her, and she was really distressed saying "it wasn't her" but no one really believed her (i was shitting myself at this stage cos i never expected it to get so severe). I never told anyone except my younger sister who was still in primary but the next year the little biatch started high school and told his mates it was me . Luckily things had calmed down a lot since the year before and they saw the funny side of it. The only prob was the letters were so convincing the guy I wrote them too thought maybe they were my real feelings and thus few years latter when I met him in a video shop he didn't know which way to look.
     
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  9. One place I worked at was full of practical jokers, it was a free for all no one was off limits so something was happening every day, you just never knew when it was your turn.

    Well one day myself and a waitress ( I am a chef), got into the apprentices locker, while he was busy in the kitchen, and sewed the legs of his pants closed just below the knees.

    you have never seen a funnier thing then this guy hopping on one leg trying to get his pants up for what seemed like a very long time.

    The next day there was a dead fish in my locker and it was sealed shut with silicon. he still dosent know I used his knife to cut open my locker!!! :shock:
     
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  10. Not mine unfortunately but the best one I've ever seen was towards the end of year 12.

    We had a teacher who had told us that he had a Prince Albert. Anyway...the class loon got the idea of "borrowing" some rare earth magnets from the physics lab and gaffering them to the bottom of the crappy thin plastic chair he had at the front of the class.

    The expression on his face when he sat down in front of an extra expectant class and a rather audible "clunk" rang out followed by us dying laughing was hilarious

    The expression when he tryed to stand up was was priceless though. :LOL:
     
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  11. I've got one, put Johnson's baby powder in somebody's gloves...:LOL:
     
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  12. LineNoise wins!!! :LOL: :shock: :LOL:
     
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  13. Not really a practical joke, but my favourite stoopid drunken party trick is to get a cocktail frankfurt and hold it to my head and say "What am I? What am I?" Some one invariably gets it and calls me a D*#khead. Then I take away the frankfurt and say "what am I now? What am I now?" And if I'm lucky someone will loudly prolcaim "You're still a D*#khead!!!"

    Then I know my job is done... :LOL:


    Edit: they automatically turn c--ktail into c%$k? C'mon admin, that's a bit harsh... :x
     
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  14. My boss made me call his inlaws that just flew in from overseas and pretned to be customs official. I had to tell them that they have bought some ilegal supstance to Australia without repoting it and they have to be deported back. Ofcourse the boss knew that they bought in some tablets for old man, they didn't have to report them anyway but they didn't know that. So he kept it going for 3 days, everyday I had ro ring them and abuse poor people. His wife got pissed off when he told her tough :LOL:
     
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  15. The Japanese are very into practical jokes - usually the nastier the better.

    I worked at the Japanese Government funded coal to oil pilot plant in Morwell back in the 80's. At the project start the IT people (me) and two junior Australian chemists (obligatory motorcycle content here: one Ducati rider, one Katana rider) shared an office with around 30 Japanese engineers, chemists etc. Not long after the project started up ,Yoji a new engineer, arrived from Japan. Yoji was a nice enough guy but a bit full of himself - especially after a few drinks.

    A couple of weeks after he started he came in on Friday and announced he was doing the compulsory Japanese weekend at Phillip island (to see the penguins). He announced to the office at large he was staying at the Ambassador there and asked where was somewhere good to eat.

    Ken (the Ducati rider) replied that the Ambassador wasn't bad (it wasn't in those days) but they had a special that wasn't on the menu. He said that you should ask for the Penguin Sushi :roll: It was expensive and they'd deny having it so you had to insist and offer lots of money.

    Yoji was a bit skeptical but all of the Japanese (hiding grins) solemnly agreed with Ken.

    Monday morning - one very irate Yoji storms into the office and announces loudly "YOU ARE BASTARD". We heaqrd from one of the other guys that he had gone into dinner (after a lot of whisky in the bar beforehand) and ordered the Penguin Sushi. When they told him they didn't have it he got very insistent and started puling out $50 bills and saying how much. It was only when the waitress said she'd call the police that the other engineers told him it was a joke!

    (personally if I'd been serving him I'd have taken the money and given him any old s*%t on rice)

    I heard that Ken got his comeuppance years later when he went to work in Sydney working on another research project. He spent his first day learning how to cut up livers, kidneys etc. taken from corpses so they could be analysed for the heavy metal content. At lunch time the other staff put on the standard welcome BBQ for him - barbecued livers, kidneys and other offall!


    TonyE
     
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  16. Black electrical tape around a horn button. Stand back and watch the victim turn the key and enjoy the ensuing panic :D

    cheers Michael
     
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  17. LineNoise - that was way to funny.... I would love to have been there for that.... that one is now on it's way around the office here...

    tears in my eyes type of thanks for the laugh!
     
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  18. Some guys in my textiles class stuck pins in the teachers apple.

    Dropping a pencil down peoples butt cracks

    spraying deoderant when you know the teacher is alergic to it...

    None of this was me :?
     
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  19. Open ice cream bucket full of water + my keys in the freezer, which I rightly deserved (I'll admit it) courtesy of some tedious share house argument. I get home before it freezes, notice (on way to vodka bottle), crack open ice layer and retrieve keys. Insert entire stash of roommate's condoms. chuckle. Exit stage left. Roommate comes home, notices something amiss. Too late to salvage condoms, frozen solid. Sees the funny side, puts them in sink to defrost, forgets about them. Condoms quietly returned to freezer. Tee hee.

    Weekend. Asleep after a party at the house, where a v.cute girl + my roommate get cozy. Late. Very late. Woken up by frustrated swearing + hollering and smashy noises as roommate attempts to retrieve protection from solid blrick of ice using a hammer... unsuccessfully. Fall back to sleep smiling.

    Morning. Wake up. Kitchen. Coffee. See sodden box of condoms in sink, still somewhat icy. Hammer next to sink. No sign of girl (ever again) - she left because my roommate seemed agressive and somewhat nuts. Tee hee.
     
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  20. RAFLMAO......very funny Bladewar, Spiky...in fact everybody....my fav...TonyE.

    LineNoise, that must've been a huge piece of jewelry.
    saeraph, that was shocking...I don't know whether the condoms can still be used after defrosting.... :?

    Anyhow, you guys have jotted my memory.

    School Hay Days - Urban Myth?
    Every science nerds know that potassium is very reactive to water. I heard from the grapevine that this guy stole the biggest chunk of potassium from a locked science lab, and he popped the whole thing in the toilet. Apparently the sewage pipes burst, and he got suspended.

    Muck-Up Day
    In Darwin also, at the end of every year for Year12 graduates, for one whole day, we go to school but no classes -- we are allow to play pranks and there's organised treasure hunts consisted of stealing street signs...called "Muck Up Day"...bet you haven't decorated the school front yard in toilet paper before.

    Corporate World Initiation
    When I was just 17, as a trainee in the corporate world, I got the crappiest job of doing internal mail runs....one time someone hid my mail trolley, I was frantic...apparently it's the "initiation"...I've since hidden a few trolleys of newcomers in other corporations...teehee.

    MS Word Prank
    In my last job, there's this two guys who forever play pranks to each other...but they never knew I was also one.....as one guy is a research officer, he writes for a living.....I put on an Auto Correction (under Tools in Word) to replace the word "inquiry" to "not another bloody inquiry"...when he realised....his paper was full of the corrections...he thought it was the other guy.

    Computer Prank
    This is a Gem that I've heard and haven't had the heart to use on anybody yet.
    Warning: This WILL fool anybody....can get out of hand...as they become frantic.

    1) Wait till the victim leave the computer
    2) Minimise all programs
    3) Hit "print screen" now
    4) Save the screen as a jpeg, bmp or gif, using Paint or similar.
    5) Go to properties from your desktop, and set the desktop background to the fake screen......by now you have the fake screen beneath.
    6) Just move and hide (or delete) all the shortcuts...and move the taskbar to the top side and set the taskbar to auto-hide as well...
    7) Now, when the victim comes back.....nothing seems to work....not even a shutdown.........teehehheheee

    Comon, anyone else have a story to share?
     
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