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Whats red & invisible ?

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by Dante, Sep 17, 2008.

  1. NO TOMATOS!!!!!

  2. What's black and white and red and can't turn round in a lift??

    A nun with a spear in her back..
  3. whats green & brown has 6 legs and is deadly. ??

  4. Each of these needs to be accompanied by one press of the big red button.
  5. What's black and white and read all over??

    A newspaper :oops:
  6. I thought that was a penguin in a blender.
  7. Why did the chicken cross the playground?

    To get to the other slide! :roll:
  8. Whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white?

    A nun rolling down a hill
  9. What has two legs and bleeds?

    Half a dog..
  10. where are all the women?
  11. Keeping mum.

    (Never trust anything that bleeds for a week every month but doesn't die.)

  12. ROFL
  13. What's an archaeologist?
    Someone whose career is in ruins...

    What's an earthquake fault?
    A topographical error...

    Why do ducks have flat, webbed feet?
    To stomp out forest fires...

    Why do elephants have flat feet?
    To stomp out burning ducks...

  14. One morning there was a little red man that got out of his little red bed and then went up his little red stairs onto his little red shower and then he got his little red soap and washed his little red body. Then he got out of his little red shower and put his little red towel around his waist. Then he heard his little red doorbell ring ,so he went to his little red door and opened it and it was his little red newspaper. Then he picked it up and dropped his towel and there was a little red lady over on the foot path. She saw him naked so she ran across the road and got hit by a car.

    The moral of the story is, never cross the road when the little red man is flashing

    There were 3 slaves, an Aussie, a Chinese and an Irishman.

    Their master pointed to a pile of sand and said, "Aussie man, you're in charge of shovelling this sand. Irishman you are in charge of scraping up the leftovers and Chinese man you are in charge of the supplies."

    An Hour later the master came back and said "Why haven't you shovelled the sand?" The Aussie and the Irishman said "Because the Chinese man didn't give us any supplies." Just then the Chinese man jumped out of the hole in the sand and said "Surplise!"