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What Am I?

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by nina, Nov 14, 2012.

  1. I am a useful tool, commonly found in the range of 8 inches long. The functioning of me is enjoyed by members of both sexes. I'm usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action.
    I boast of a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other.
    In use, I am quickly inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where I am thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements.
    Anyone found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements.
    When finally withdrawn, a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance is left behind, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from my long glistening shaft.
    After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, I am returned to my freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action. Hopefully reaching my bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much less.

    What am I? :whistle:
  2. toothbrush
    • Like Like x 1
  3. OMG

    I'm going away for 3 days with you Nina
  4. We'll have fun, right? :p
  5. I was thinking that, but my toothbrush does not have a hole on one end and it doesn't dangle...it sits in a cup nor does it glisten...
  6. :p You clearly have the wrong instrument then!
  7. It was just a guess... I could be wrong :)
  8. It does make sense. Especially considering men overestimate what 8 inches is.
    • Like Like x 2
  9. Well I initially thought it was a dick, but I certainly don't have 8 inches, even with exaggeration or encouragement :)
  10. Toilet brush?
  11. you heat your toilet?
  12. Regularly. With warm, steamy excrement.
  13. + 1 for ultram Im going for the tooth brush also