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Ways you can describe your motorcycle, but not your girlfriend

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by Mouth, Nov 28, 2015.

  1. 1. Things you can say about your business, but not your girlfriend
    2. Phrases you can use to describe a truck, but not your girlfriend @ 1:07
    3. Things you can say to your dog, but not your girlfriend @ 1:46
    4. Things you can say about your boat, but not your girlfriend @ 2:55
    5. Things you can say about the food you eat, but not your girlfriend @ 3:55
    6. Ways you can describe your motorcycle, but not your girlfriend @ 4:48
    7. Things you might say about your computer, but not your girlfriend @ 5:37

    Just give it a kick and
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  2. Whose line is a very funny show the irish drinking songs and Hoedown segments are funny to
    • Agree Agree x 1
  3. 'She likes to be lent over.......hard' :D
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  4. Needs regular lubrication in the wet season
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  5. I have a bike and my wife ignores it. If I had a girlfriend, my wife would, well I'm, I shudder to think.....oh FCUK!
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  6. She lives in the basement. I only let her out when I wanna have some fun.

    She makes an unholy noise whenever I twist her neck.

    She's totally worth the money.
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  7. I like the first joke about the computer.

    "Damn it......it's gone down again!"

    Gold. Pure gold.
  8. She's red and smells of oil, lube and burnt rubber...
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  9. When she starts playing up, it's usually because the chain is loose.
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  10. I like the look of her p-pad when its wet? Terrible, I know.
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  11. #11 Barters81, Dec 1, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 1, 2015
    Often when I compress the forks too much the front wants to slide out........

    *I'm clutching at straws now......but can't let this thread of humour die. (Damn you American spelling its humoUr!!)
  12. motorcycle is a girl, motorcycle is not girl =D
  13. Uhm, don't wanna be the spoiler of "fun" here but how is this amusing?
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  14. The original question was 'Ways you can describe your bike and not your girlfriend' hence.....

    Are two examples of how someone could describe his bike BUT NOT his girlfriend.

    The original question wasn't "Ways you can describe your bike and your girlfriend".

    The fact that these are inappropriate is the very thing that makes them humorous as it's obviously not a way you'd describe your girlfriend etc.
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  15. I can see how this can be misconstrued, however its just a bit humour 'American style'.
    Lets not paint this thread to make it look like something its not.
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  16. The humour lies in the juxtaposition of two different meanings of the same line: a (usually irreverent but generally innocent) description of the motorcycle and a (sexually explicit, derogatory, or otherwise inappropriate) description of the girlfriend. The fact that the joke format forces you to parse the line as a description of the girlfriend - to actually mentally process the wrongness of it - just adds an additional shock humour aspect to the joke.

    Furthermore, the "but not" aspect of the joke is a nudge-and-a-wink towards its inappropriateness - everyone knows that the joker had to have thought of the line as a description of their girlfriend, but the joke format acts as a fig leaf that allows them to say the line "innocently" (as a description of their computer/bike/car/whatever) and let the listener form the dirty joke in their own mind.

  17. After a long ride, I'll hose her down outside.
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  18. Rofl
  19. How about some "ways you can describe your motorcycle but not your boyfriend"?

    He is the endurance model

    Both my feet can't touch the ground when I sit on it
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  20. Chicken strips are a thing of the past.

    My old man rides her better then I can.
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