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Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by removed-6, May 16, 2008.
Every now and then someone comes along with an idea that seems so simple......
Old trick. You guys must have wasted your time at uni.
Saving that one :wink:
So . . . easy to skull???
clearly he's an Engineer.
And he probably got his masters too
Just make sure he don't show his guts in the morning...it'll be like Mt. Vesuvius the 2nd
Doonx came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk,
as he often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already
asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke,
he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed.
'Who the hell are you?', demanded Doonx, 'and what are you doing in
my bedroom ?'
The mysterious man answered, 'This isn't your bedroom and I'm Saint Vic.'
Doonx was stunned. 'You mean I'm dead!! That can't be, I have so much
to live for - and I haven't said goodbye to my family. . . You've got to
send me back straight away.'
Saint Vic replied, 'Yes, you can be reincarnated but there is a catch. We can
only send you back as a dog or a hen.'
Doonx was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his
house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.
A flash of light later, he was covered in feathers and clucking around,
pecking the ground. 'This ain't so bad', he thought until he felt this strange
feeling welling up inside him.
Mouth the farmyard rooster strolled over and said, 'So you're the new
hen eh?! How are you enjoying your first day here ?'
'It's not so bad', replies Doonx, 'but I have this strange feeling inside like
I'm about to explode.'
'You are ovulating', explained Mouth the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never
laid an egg before?'
'Never', replies Doonx.
'Well just relax and let it come out' explained Mouth the rooster.
And so he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops
out from his arse.
An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the
better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.
When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming
and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that
ever happened to him . . . Ever!!!
The joy kept coming and coming again.
As he was just about to lay his fifth egg, he felt an enormous smack on
the back of his head.
.. and heard his wife shouting,
'Doonx, wake up, you drunken bastard. You've shitted the f*cken bed'