Copied from http://www.livejournal.com/users/ernunnos/1098841.html So, more suicide bombings today. And I had to wonder: who wears a coat that can cover enough explosive to outright kill fifty people? I can't imagine doing that in Phoenix, even when it is jacket weather. Doesn't the appearance of a guy in a parka set off some warning bells in Iraq? I know the Israeli checkpoint guards have caught a few bombers for wearing heavy clothes. We need to introduce Iraqis to the motorcycle squid uniform: flip flops, cargo shorts, wife beater, Oakleys, and a baseball cap. Can't hide a serious bomb in that. Of course, squid couture requires squid culture. That means motorcycles. I figure we start with an airlift of a million Suzuki GSXR1000s. No doubt the U.S. government can get a discount in quantity. Figure $5,000 each. $5 billion. Chump change compared to what the war has cost so far. This also solves other problems. First, Iraqis have been complaining that their gas price has gone from 5 cents to 25 cents per gallon, and even literbikes are relatively fuel efficient transportation. Second, young Iraqi males who might otherwise be tempted to join the insurgency for kicks will be able to risk their lives more productively, trying to get chicks by showing off their mad stunta skillz. Sure, plenty will die, but they won't take many others with them, and the survivors will provide a whole new crop of MotoGP racers, bringing Iraq into the global sporting and entertainment community. Their prowess on two wheels will be a point of national pride that Kurds, Sunnis and Shiites can all rally (ha!) around. And really, doesn't it make sense that the part of the world with the most oil should be a center—if not the center—of motor sport? Peace through speed.