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The little thread of unrealistic scenarios

Discussion in 'General Motorcycling Discussion' started by smileedude, Mar 17, 2015.

  1. #1 smileedude, Mar 17, 2015
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2015
    So we all think of really strange things while riding. Here's a place to put those thoughts.

    I'll start with my most common one. You are crossing a large empty parking lot at about 20 km/h on your R1. All of a sudden something bites your right upper arm hard. It goes limp and you realise you've been hit by gun fire. There's trees 100m away on your left. An open building 200m on your right or open road 300m in the centre with a hospital 2kms away. Your arm is bleeding profusely and your feeling light headed. All you have is a mobile phone. What do you do?

    More will be added as you make your decisions. Some of you will die.

  2. Plug the leak and get the first available flight out of Beirut.
  3. Put pressure on the wound and radio for the napalm.
  4. My dear follow, smileedude, if that is a "common" thought that you have I think perhaps you might need some psychiatric help, or, as an alternative..... more beer.
  5. Stop the bleeding, fall down act dead.
    Too far to run in any direction, except maybe behind you, back where you just came from? You didn't say what was in that direction, did you
  6. Negative. Beer makes you bleed more profusely and you bleed to death. You're out Crazy
    • Funny Funny x 1
  7. How does this work? Can we add to this by saying you where riding with your upper torso sticking out of the M1A1 Abrams tank?

    Next would be falling back inside and closing the hatch.
  8. Choose your own adventures. I used to love these. :)

    At this stage I'd have to assume the weapon is a rifle or pistol. If it was a shot gun, I'd eather have more damage than an arm, unless he's a very bad aim and I got hit by a stray pellet, or I'm right on the edge of range.

    I'd opt for the open building, but running in a random zig zag motion towards there (provided that the shot didn't come from that direction). Building will give more cover, more options to evade and stronger protection.
  9. This almost happened to me and then I moved from Melton and now all is good.
    • Funny Funny x 6
    • Winner Winner x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  10. Doi I forgot to add you're on a motorcycle at the time. It's in general forum after all. Let's just say you're doing 20 at the time and it's an r1.

    Mcsena, grey gentry and rob You fall off your bikes as you plug the wound with your only good arm. Your left with nowhere to run and are gunned down.

    Crazycam you stop to make a smart arse comment about how absurd the situation is and get struck by a falling cow.

    ajrider, you do nothing to stop the bleeding and trip over a splattered cow due to your faintness.
  11. Try to grab throttle with left hand, head for trees. That won't work very well but maybe the wobbling and jerkiness will make me a more difficult target. Think "They didn't cover this at HART". Point bike at trees in hope that I make it before blood loss makes me black out.I should add I have poor blood pressure control, I can already sense the tunnel vision.
  12. The body armour does its job though, I'm winded, but alive, I have a fair idea about the direction now. It's deathly quiet... then I hear the jets off in the distance and I spot an open concrete storm water pipe 50m away... when the jets are loud enough and I think the sniper's attention is drawn, I muster all my strength and sprint to the storm water pipe and dive in just as the napalm is released...
  13. Pull my gun out, shoot the fkr in the head, use his blood to replace mine, call my wife as she knows everything and can fix anything
    • Like Like x 3
    • Funny Funny x 2
  14. Tap it & aim for the hospital. If I bleed out at least it'll be fun.

    (I'm assuming the shooter is an amateur & won't be able to properly aim at a fast moving target)
    • Like Like x 1
  15. I'm pretty sure if I just got shot in the shoulder I would be riding a Triumph TR6 Trophy rather than a R1. I also think there would be barbed wire fences nearby, and green fields. And Germans, lots of Germans...
    • Funny Funny x 5
  16. Call your father in law and ask him to tell his daughter to stop shooting. You're Just going out for a ride...
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  17. I feel like I'm waking up in a dream. A moment ago I was still safely perched on the top of the tank with the feel of the 0.5 calibre heavy machine gun against my side, the next I'm suddenly pulled back into reality, a sudden numbness spreading down my right arm as the bullet hits.

    Am I back in Iraq? What's happening? Damn, if only I could think clearly.

    I see the open building to the right, open the throttle and start hoping that I'll make it.
  18. If you are riding an R1 then the sniper is likely your jilted gay, Lebanese, lover.

    The best thing to do is stop and confess your love and then suggest you'll buy him a kebab after you get out of hospital.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  19. Take a selfie and post it on Facebook?
    • Funny Funny x 4
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  20. #shot #dying
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Funny Funny x 1