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The dangers of motorcycling

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by es, Nov 7, 2005.

  1. It may disturb some of you to hear this news, especially considering the fatalites we have had on the forum this week...

    As many know, I am a learner in the first degree and have had a few incidents, close calls etc in my 7 months of riding, however last friday was the worst day in history for me.

    I rode to oakligh to visit my grandmother for her birthday in the aftenoon... opened my visor to get some air and a bug hit me on the nose!!!!

    "whatever" some may say, that incident was mediocre in comparison to what happened later...

    I got home.... and we were out of choccolate!!

    I went down the street to buy some *cough* &%^#*&# and, for me, some clinkers... all good you may assume, but then!
    *Oh noes!*
    I broke a nail on my clutch leaver!!!!

    Then i got home, and mats feet stunk.
    I dont mean smell bad... they full on stunk. Smelled dead rabbit thats been sitting under a house for two consecutive 45degree days?

    well, Mats feet wernt that bad but they were pretty gross. Safe to say the grosest feet ive smelt in awhile.

    (on the upside I had clinkers)
  2. Hmmmmm

    The perils of being 18, female and learning to ride :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

    Be careful, the bug may have been a male bug...... :eek: :eek:
  3. oh common eswen 8)

    Msg too short my ass 8)
  4. Seems either you have to a) Watch you chcocolate stock levels more closely or b) tighten up you chocolate security measures so this can never happen again. Think of the pain and suffering you could save yourself from, i mean NO chocolate? how would you survive? :roll:

    :p :LOL:
  5. Alas These are all things we go up against to enjoy the freedom of the open road on two wheels :p

    Good Work on the clinkers ;)
  6.  Top
  7. whats wrong with male bugs???
  8. Nothing, you just get double the SPLAT and it is harder to wash out :eek: :eek: :LOL: :LOL:

    So, seriously though, are you really that much of a nutt about chocolate?????

    So you realise all the problems you will experience with your skin (not pimples) when you are in your mid 20's.???? Let alone the impact on your internals and the likely hood of suffering sever migranes?????
  9. you obviously havent tried my "Chocolate Excess" (thanks boogie for the name :LOL:)
  10.  Top
  11. Ummm he wasn't refferring to 7 was he Eswen?

  12. you people are just sick :p
  13. Quote from Uban Dictionary site "Clinker":

    "ooooh mumma! i couldn't get my self off prior to the invention of the clinker *THANK YOU PASCALLS*"

    Thats a bit of a worry now isn't it. Some people must really need a Girlfriend / Boyfriend if they have to resort to lollies.

    It's a very strange world...
  14. I think you got the order of the words mixed up.
  15. Nil Orally.

    Good point, female, 18 and learning to ride.......... All three are very difficult if you meet criteria 1...... :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:
  16. Mat's feet sound like they could be solved quite easily. You just need to hose him down with a high presure fire hose before entry to the appartment. Get him up against the fence or wall, recreate something similar to the scene in Rambo II (I think it was 2).......as dehumanising as possible.
  17. Matt232... Stop it....... The ride is over soldier.........

    Be cautious people, Matt232 thinks he is always in a riding adventure.... :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:

    Oh, with reference to the water torture, I think it was in Rambo 1..... Someone correct me if I am wrong.....
  18. poor mat :(

    Havent seen him for a couple of days. Maybe his feet ate him?
  19. Fixed your post for you.
  20. Yeah it was the first Rambo movie, Sheriff hoses him down - he goes nuts and hides in the woods.