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Terrorist School Teacher Arrested

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by egiste, Jun 12, 2006.

  1. Terrorist School Teacher Arrested, as reported first on CNN

    NEW YORK - A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator.

    At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez said he believes the man is member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

    "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzalez said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle."

    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."

    White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent and profound statement by the President.
  2. Which leads me to wonder: how DO they teach suicide bombers?

    "Listen kids, I'm only going to show you this ONCE..."

    "Ah, kids, they blow up so quickly these days..."

    Or the terrorist women, hiding C4 under their burqas and asking "does my bomb look big in this?"

    These gags admiringly stolen from KBW.
  3. I love it.

    Another one,

    How do you stop the president from counting higher then ten??

    Double tie his shoe laces.

    :shock: :LOL: :p