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Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by grange, Jun 5, 2009.

  1. Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside the operating room.

    The first kid leans over and asks, 'What are you in here for?'

    The second kid says, 'I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous.'

    The first kid says, 'You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jello and ice cream. It's a breeze.'

    The second kid then asks, 'What are you here for?'

    The first kid says, 'A circumcision.'

    'Whoa!' the second kid replies. 'Good luck buddy. I had that done when I was born.

    Couldn't walk for a year.
  2. Two dogs are in the waiting room at the vet.

    One dog says to the other, 'What are you in here for?'
    The other dog replies, 'I just can't help myself, I keep biting the postman. My owners have been ordered to have me destroyed, so I'm in here to be put to sleep. What about you?'

    'My owner is a beautiful young woman, when she's out in the garden and bends over to pull out a weed, I just can't help myself, I have to mount her'

    'Oh dear, so you're here to be put down as well then...'

    'No, I'm getting my toenails clipped'
  3. ahahahhahahahaa to both lol. (the first one got a guffaw out of me though ;))