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Stolen body parts!

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by Tweetster, Aug 6, 2009.

  1. No doubt you've heard about people who have been abducted and
    had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.

    Well, my thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years
    ago. I went
    to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just
    that quick. The
    replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs
    were these and
    what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my

    Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life
    in jeans.

    And then, the thieves struck again........

    My bum was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took
    pains to
    match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with
    earlier. But my
    new bum was attached at least three inches lower than my
    original! I then
    realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favour of long skirts!

    Then two years ago, I realized my arms had been switched. One
    morning I was
    drying my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper
    arm swing to
    and fro with the motion of the hairbrush... this was really
    getting scary -
    my body was being replaced one section at a time.

    I was sick wondering what could they do to me next?

    When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a
    turkey neck,
    I decided to tell my story. Women of the world wake up and smell
    the coffee!

    Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts -
    stolen from
    you and me! The next time someone you know has something
    'lifted', look
    again - was it lifted from you?

    THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere, every


    P.S. Only last year, I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I
    was lying in
    bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was
    relieved to see
    that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I
    keep them tucked in my waistband


  2. Can I guess what is the next part that gets "stolen".... :LOL:
  3. ..surprise me!!...... :-k
  4. Solution: Divorce / split from said wife / girlfriend and suddenly they receive all their original body parts again.