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stick with it

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by ibast, Apr 9, 2008.

  1. Late last Saturday night, a young chap was walking home from the pub.
    It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing. Most
    of the streetlights in the area were broken, and the silence was only
    broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a
    dustbin.
    Suddenly he heard a strange noise ...

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    Startled, he turned around. To his amazement, through the driving rain
    he saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road.

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    He froze to the spot. He couldn't believe his eyes. As the box
    approached from the shadows, he was able to make out its shape more

    Clearly. It was a coffin. Not wanting anything to do with this, he put
    his head down and started walking briskly home.

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    BUMP ...

    The coffin was gaining on him. He started walking faster ...

    BUMP ... BUMP ...

    BUMP ... BUMP ...

    BUMP ... BUMP ...

    The coffin was closing with his every step. He started to jog, but he

    Heard the coffin speed up after him ...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...

    He started to sprint, but so did the coffin ...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP...

    BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP....

    Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was
    only seconds behind. Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled out his
    keys, His hand trembling, he managed to open the lock. He dived
    inside, slamming the front door behind him. He shot into his front room, and
    slumped into his comfy chair.
    Suddenly there was a loud crash, as the coffin smashed its way through
    the front door. The force of the impact broke the lock off the coffin
    allowing the lid to swing freely on its rusty hinges as it continued
    its chase ..



    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking legs could
    take him. He bolted upstairs to the bathroom and locked the door ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. HOP... BUMP... SCREECH ... HOP...

    he coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing and
    launched itself at the bathroom door. With an almighty smash, the
    bathroom door flew off its hinges ...

    The coffin stood in the doorway, then started to approach the young
    terrified lad.

    BUMP.... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for his bathroom
    cabinet ... He grabbed a bar of Imperial Leather soap and threw it at
    the coffin ... still it came ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    He grabbed his can of deodorant and threw it ... still it
    came ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    He grabbed his first aid kit and threw it ... still it came ...

    BUMP... SCREECH .. BUMP... SCREECH ...

    He grabbed a bottle of cough mixture and threw it ...

    The coffin stopped.
     
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  2. I don't get it :(
     
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  3. :LOL:

    Bastard!
     
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  4. Hahahahahah, I had no idea where that was headed :grin:
     
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  5. The coffin stopped.

    The coughin' stopped.

    It's an iq test. :LOL:
     
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  6. +1 to that.....here i was reading throug it thinking how are they gonna finish this one off :LOL:
     
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  7. :LOL: :LOL:
    love it
     
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  8. gold.
     
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  9. A different version I've heard:

    A hearse was transporting a coffin to the cemetary when upon getting to the top of a steep hill it hit a large pothole. The doors in the back of the hearse swung open and the coffin fell out of the herse and began its descent down the hill. It slid down the hill at great speed, running two red lights and nearly running down a lady with a pram. The coffin got to the end of the road, bounced over the kerb, across the pavement, smashed through the glass doors of a chemist, took out two display racks on its way to thumping into the counter with such force, that the coffin stood up on its end. The top door swung open and to the pharmacist's horror, the corpse inside opened its eyes and said...."Can you please give me something to stop this coffin".
     
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  10. +2! gold!!! hahaha
     
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