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Remarkable Obituary:

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by Iffracem, Apr 4, 2005.

  1. Don't know if this is the right forum, admins please move to where you think it should be.

    Thought it might be a humour thing, but it's to close to the truth (as I see it) to be a joke. Anyways... here it is.

    Remarkable Obituary:

    Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Mr. Common Sense.
    Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how
    old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic
    red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable
    lessons such as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the
    early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
    more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not
    kids, are in charge).

    His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but
    overbearing regulations were set in place. - Reports of a six-year-old
    boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens
    suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher
    fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
    Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get
    parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but, could not
    inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have
    an abortion.

    Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments
    became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received
    better treatment than their victims. Common Sense finally gave up the
    ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee
    was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge financial

    Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust,
    his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son,
    Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.
    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
    If you still remember him, pass this on; if not, join the majority
    and do nothing
  2. Cat food 'do not eat'

    Fruit & Nut chocolate bar 'may contain nuts'