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Real Hump Day Funny - River Crossing

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by pvda, Dec 14, 2005.

  1. Seeing someone else is trying to steal my thunder, here is the real Hump Day Funny

    Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed,

    "God, please give me the strength to cross the river."

    Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice.

    After witnessing that, the second man prayed,

    "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river."

    Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once.

    Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river.

    Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.

    Now if this doesn't get me back into the good books with some of the female members I've upset with a few other jokes recently then I give up :p
  2. pfft i already posted this one... actually i think ive posted it twice :LOL:

    but i love it :D
  3. You've gotta be happy with that one. :D

    And its probably true anyway, cos everyone knows that men can neither read maps, or ask for directions!!! :wink:
  4. I never bother to read your joke posts and if you posted twice I doubly didn't read it :p

    Only gagging :wink:
  5. pfft. i never read your jokes either... jerk
  6. Actually....

    According to some research paper I read at work but forgot the name of (was in some scientific/medical journal someone left in their laptop bag).

    95% of men can read a map by simply following their intended course on it. 95% of women will turn the map when their route turns, so that they are always "travelling" in the same direction on the map.

    Not a shot at men vs women, just some food for thought.
  7. And about 85% of men have the ability to determine north in a dark room with no direction indications. Only about 15% of women can do this.

    Brain scans show 2 general patterns of electrical energy and one type seems to be able to do this and the other not. The type that can is more prevelant amongst males.

    Some studdies suggest that more females than males can multitask well though.

    I strongly suspect the latter is more useful :wink:
  8. thats totally true...every woman i know has to keep turning the map otherwise they cant make left from right.
  9. Interesting... I must admit I wouldn't be able to ascertain where north is in a dark room... (sometimes even in a light room I'd be struggling!!) and I also turn the map so it faces the direction I'm heading if I'm following it... but I can multi-task... which includes doing a wicked karoke when I'm riding on twisty bits of road.