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Random little bike stories etc etc

Discussion in 'General Motorcycling Discussion' started by Ktulu, Aug 17, 2006.

  1. Just thought instead of making a new topic every time I see something I want to share, I'll just have my own little awesome thread that I update/resurrect every so often with another story.

    Feel free to check it for new stuff if you want... I don't care, I'll post anyway.

    So today coming back from work!

    At the Briens Rd [becomes Old Windsor] / Cumberland Hwy intersection at like 5:20pm I see a one-participant drag race.
    A red and white Yamaha YSF1000 moves off from the lights in a calm and collected manner.

    Meanwhile! -in the right lane, quite possibly in his big sister's Lancer named 'Shuga Pi" [or sum shit], Captain Auto has decided that his GLXi has got a shot at teaching this biker a lesson.

    From what I could see, this is what the vehicles had:

    Yamaha YZF1000:
    - nice red and white paint scheme.
    - probably stock exhaust.
    - that's about it.

    Zomg Lancer Evo! Nuh uh! STFU it looks like one! No they didn't even do an Evo in that shape you stoned, negative IQ, preschool drop-out:
    - aftermarket clear rear light-clusters. (that's like, + 5 horsepower)
    - no spoiler. (so it looks like a Supra that isn't trying as a hard as it's owner).
    - fake-alloys hub caps (come on champ, you could have bought half a pack of Winfield Reds for the cost of those!).

    Now for the climax of the story:
    YZF disappears up the road, completely unaware someone is racing it :p

    Lancer trails as best he can. BTW, his name is Captain Auto because it was a manual and the sound that came from that poor bloody car's gearbox as Cap Auto raped 2nd has a bright future in advertising for Violet Crumbles and Crunchies.

    It sounded like 1000 Lego men in a hydraulic press!
    ... like a Chup-a-chup under a steel-capped boot!
    ... like old-school Xmas decorations getting hit by a bus!
    ... like a Maglite failing the truck test!
    ... like chewing Doritos except I felt the same amount of pain for those gears as when one ends up vertical and stabs you in the roof of your mouth!

    'And Ktulu laughed his balls off...

    ...pulled over - picked them up, welded them back on, and drove home.'