after declining DrSleepy 's so very kind invitation to ride the Oxley or to even meet up, I was downstairs in the garage today and Zeddee's eyes dolefully followed me around as always. I went down the shops, came home, put the riding gear on, marched downstairs, opened the gates, opened the garage got on Zeddee started him up. I ride down the really steep incline to the gates, hopped off, closed garage door, closed gates got back on. You know my teeth were chattering with fear and some adrenaline. I said to myself, you know you can do this no probs, just do it. So I took off, gear changes smooth as a baby's bum and it felt so FCUKING AMAZING to be riding again!!! Next challenge petrol and tyres. No probs pulled up smoothly, kick stand down, petrol in (didn't need a pfoof of air at all!) and off we both went. The day was so beautiful and the feel of Zeddee throbbing between my thighs was sublime. I had missed riding so much. Not just the mechanics of it, but that intimate feeling you have with your machine, the heightened awareness if everything around you, the gentle caress of sun on your face, the thrill of the wind at your throat and just doing riding. I didn't even get tense hand cramps, it just all felt so natural. I hadn't ridden since Zeddee got repaired in early April and had no luck selling him. But maybe it wasn't meant to be. I worked out that since February I had ridden Zeddee three pathetic times. It had been a funny couple of weeks with me suddenly needing a forensic accountant to uncover the wealth my ex had hidden away...ah trust in a relationship it is a sacred thing huh? I was gutted to find out just how much I had been used over the years...and I never ever knew...what a fool I have been... i have really been sideblinded by this. WTF. I had sort of felt like giving up on absolutely everything to be honest and I don't know that I can trust anyone ever again but the ride with Zeddee today really realy helped me to regain my faith in my own abilities and accept them for what they are and to yet again realise that it is only me that can let things happen be they good or bad. I did it. I can do it and I will do it again. Zeddee isn't the problem, I am. We rode about 200km all up no photos just riding and absorbing it all into my psyche. So refreshing and cleansing for the soul to get out on the road. It is so beautiful up here. I had to share this with others who ummm "get it" thanks for lettting me share!