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Now Hiring

Discussion in 'The Pub' started by Ljiljan, Feb 23, 2012.

  1. Ad here: http://nowhiring.com.au/424936+job+Prime+Minister+of+Australia+ACT.aspx

    Prime Minister of Australia

    Applicants should have extensive experience in the public service or private enterprise, exceptional spoken and written language skills, a genuine interest in, and thorough knowledge of, current affairs, economics, history, statecraft and philosophy, be an eloquent speaker, and be an earnest and empathetic individual of outstanding moral character. However, we will settle for applicants who have a pulse.

    You will report to Her Excellency the Governor General, the people of Australia, backbenchers, the Leader of the Opposition, faceless men, and Alan Jones.

    You will be expected to manage a large team of experienced senior executives, each with varying responsibilities and capabilities, and proven track records. Wayne Swan will also be there.

    Under your leadership, this team will be required to manage both domestic and foreign policy (preferably with occasional successes). You will move Australia forward and build our future whilst giving working families a fair go, protecting our borders and building an economy that is the envy of the world by ensuring our environment is preserved for future generations and stopping the boats, whilst upholding our humanitarian responsibilities to the traditional owners of the land.

    In addition, your office will be staffed by a team of dedicated and competent casuals and volunteers. Note that these groups are separate; the dedicated individuals are not competent, and the competent individuals are not dedicated.

    Your tenure will be subject to periodic review by the populace, to be held at 3-year intervals or at the Governor-General’s pleasure. Your appointment will also be subject to the ongoing support of three unpopular men from the bush, and following a 3 month probation period your performance will be assessed in the latest Newspoll.

    You may at times be required to work longer than the specified 38 hour work week; however, this should not be too inconvenient as the position is expected to be temporary.
    Click 'Apply Now' for preliminary screening questions
  2. :LOL:
  3. They're acting like a bunch of high school kids.. its so ****ing annoying.

    sack the lot of them.
  4. My outside prediction, rudd will quit labor and start his own party or run as an independent if he doesn't win.
  5. Perhaps a tilt at state politics? QLD's got an election coming up with a presently unpopular Labor government....

    Although if had to put my money anywhere it'd be on a job with UN or similar.
  6. Rudd has a hard-on for the UN. He loves the grand standing and speeches and posturing. If there was a position available he'd be all over it. I don't know if they need another process-driven bureaucrat with no track record of results.

    I'm liking the labor party all lining up to lay the boot into Rudd. Apparently he's a psychopathic, dysfunctional egomaniac. And all this from a party machine that presented the deranged Mark Latham as a viable leader. They need to stick with Gillard. I can't stand her but I think she's the first mentally sound candidate for prime minister that the labor party has been able to sc**** up for years. (Beazly excepted)
  7. Nah, his been too vocal about his dislike of the labor party in its current form and they've torn him apart too much. I don't see him being able to stay in it. Although he won't withdraw his support for the government.
    He is right about one thing though, Abbott as PM scares the absolute shit out of me. Even if they could engineer a liberal leadership spill so anyone else (Heck I would even take Katter over Abbott) could be PM I would be happy.
  8. I don't know what you are looking for with regards to results, but Australia watched other countries of the world burn during the GEC while sailing through relatively unharmed.
  9. We were only mildly effected because we have stuff in the ground that everyone else wants and our banks are to a degree regulated.

    Even Tony Abbott might have got us through, nah ..... what was I thinking!!](*,)