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NOT, repeat, not, the Friday Funny

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by hornet, Oct 28, 2005.

  1. {I don't think this has been posted before; there are not enough unique words in it for it to show up in 'search'. If it has, I don't remember, but then again, if you read it right through, you'll probably know why.......}

    Do you have A.A.A.D.D?
    They have finally found a diagnosis for my condition. Hooray!!! I'm not crazy, after all!

    I have recently been diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder...This is how it goes:

    I decide to wash the car. I start toward the garage and notice the mail on the table. OK, I'm going to wash the car. But first I'm going to go through the mail. I lay the car keys down on the desk, discard the junk mail, and I notice the rubbish bin is full. OK, I'll just put the bills on my desk and take the rubbish out, but since I'm going to be near the mailbox anyway, I'll pay these few bills first.

    Now, where is my cheque book? Oops, there's only one cheque left. My extra cheques are in my desk.

    Oh, there's the coke I was drinking. I'm going to look for those cheques. But first I need to put my coke further away from the computer, or maybe I'll pop it into the fridge to keep it cold for a while.

    I head toward the kitchen and my flowers catch my eye; they need some water.

    I set the coke on the counter and uh oh! There are my glasses. I was looking for them all morning! I'd better put them away first.

    I fill a container with water and head for the flowerpots - - Aaaaaagh! Someone left the TV remote in the kitchen. We will never think to
    look in the kitchen tonight when we want to watch television so I'd better put it back in the family room where it belongs.

    I splash some water into the pots and onto the floor. I throw the remote onto a soft cushion on the sofa and I head back down the hall trying to
    figure out what it was I was going to do?

    End of Day:

    The car isn't washed, the bills are unpaid, the coke is sitting on the kitchen counter, the flowers are half watered, the cheque book still
    only has one cheque in it, and I can't seem to find my car keys!

    When I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY LONG!!!

    I realize this is a serious condition and I'll get help, BUT FIRST I think I'll check my e-mail...
  2. Dr Pete sez: Bugger the bills, go for a ride, clear your head and don't forget where you parked the bike...

    To quote Roger Daltry: I hope I die before before I get old... (Not that you're old or anything Paul...)
  3. LOL, Paul, I'm 28 and relate to those symptoms, though, maybe I just have plain old regular ADD :)
  4. HAHAHAHA, that was absolutely FANTASTIC Paul!!! I found that so very amusing because i think i'm starting to show symptoms already. SOMEBODY please help me!!
  5. Josh, ask your Dad, he'll help (if he remembers where your room is!!) :D
  6. you must be like me. Early Onset AAADD.
  7. LOL boz, I wonder if it can get me time off work :)

  8. Amputate. At the neck. It's the only solution.
  9. geez thats almost excalty what happens at work, start one thing and ge told to do something else.. come the end of the day i have started millions on different jobs and not one is finished....
  10. That's the default policy in most offices I've been in too. It's called Chaos Theory Management, and when they sack you, they tell you it's your fault! They created the chaos, but you couldn't manage it.
  11. :LOL:

    At least once you've been fired the Chaos is a SEP*

    * Read Douglas Addams
  12. Ah yes, pete, I'm a great believer in the doctrine of SEP
  13. That's all good and well, but I feel like I always end up being the SE with the P ;)

  14. Yeah Hornet, that reminds me of when I.........
    ......hey look, the lawn need mowing.....
  15. that would be what's known as EOAAADD!! :LOL:
  16. Hornet, if I didn't know better, -------what was I on about?

    oh yeah, someone has been watching me doing the same thing, --what did I do?

    I raced out to the workshop the other day, raining of course, got wet, got to shelter. What the ****am I doing here. Back I go to ask wife what it was I was supposed to do. Noticed garden gate open. Shut it, got soaked.

    Got inside. Wife says 'did you find your glasses?' Ah, so that is what I was doing.

    Out again. Can't find glasses in shed. Back inside again. Wife says did you find them? I says no they're not in the shed. She says they're in the car.
    Out again. Find the glasses. Back inside. Wife says what did you need the glasses for?

    Can't remember. Stuff it. Watch telly.

    Question, am I getting worse? Dunno, can't remember.
  17. Thanks for the heads up people, now I know what I have to look forward too, woe is me...