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man walks into a bar no#1 million

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by fubarcbr, Jul 13, 2007.

  1. a man walks into a bar after work one night and orders a beer, as he is ordering he sees a jar full of 100 dollar bills. so he asks the bar tender what is the jar of money about? the bartender replies it is a little competion we are having.

    to win all the money, you have to first drink a pepper martini without making a face, then there is pit bull out side that needs a tooth pulled and if you can get throught that there is a 70yr old lady upstairs that has never had an orgasim.

    The man says maybe later and takes his drink and sits down. About and hour later and quite a few pints he yells across the bar "bring on the pepper martini". the bartender brings it over and he downs it without making a face, he then gets up and marches straight out the back.



    after a few minutes everyone in the bar starts to hear alot of yelping and screaming, and all of a sudden the man walks back into the bar and goes "so where's the old lady that needs the tooth pulled"

    :grin: :grin:
     
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  2. :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: Nice one!
     
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  3. ha, didnt expect that! :grin:
     
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  4. A man walked into a bar






    They called the ambulance....
     
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  5. It's past your bedtime mister..........




    Off you go...
     
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  6. 3 men walk into a bar.

    One of them; is a little bit stupid.

    And the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.


    ...
     
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  7. Two men walked into a bar







    You thought one of them would have seen it.

    A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
     
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  8. hehehe I love it. Hope he bought the dog dinner :LOL:
     
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  9. An oldie but a goodie. When I first heard it (around 30 years ago), it was in Alaska, and it was a Barmaid and and a Grizzly Bear, not an old lady and a pitbull......
     
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  10. but wouldn't a Grizzly bear want to eat you? :wink: :LOL:
     
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  11. a man walks into a bar and says ow.

    a fish swims into a walla and says dam.
     
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  12. A bloke walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!" he gulps it down and says, "Give me another beer before problems start!" This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the barman is totally confused and asks, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"
     
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  13. My favourite:

    "So this baby seal walks into a club..."
     
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  14. a man runs into a bar and is huffing and puffing as he gets to the counter so the bar tender gets him a beer and asks why are you so flustered. the guy sculls the beer and goes i was just at the bar up the road and couldn't pay for the beer and the guy chased me down the street.
     
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  15. I'll second that! Love the baby seal jokes.
     
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  16. lol nice one by itself the seal one was funny as hell :LOL:
     
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  17. A termite walked in and said, "Where's the bartender?"
     
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  18. A baby seal walks into a pub and the bartenders goes "So what'll you have?"

    The baby seal replies "Anything but a Canadian Club"
     
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