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man walks into a bar no#1 million

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by fubarcbr, Jul 13, 2007.

  1. a man walks into a bar after work one night and orders a beer, as he is ordering he sees a jar full of 100 dollar bills. so he asks the bar tender what is the jar of money about? the bartender replies it is a little competion we are having.

    to win all the money, you have to first drink a pepper martini without making a face, then there is pit bull out side that needs a tooth pulled and if you can get throught that there is a 70yr old lady upstairs that has never had an orgasim.

    The man says maybe later and takes his drink and sits down. About and hour later and quite a few pints he yells across the bar "bring on the pepper martini". the bartender brings it over and he downs it without making a face, he then gets up and marches straight out the back.

    after a few minutes everyone in the bar starts to hear alot of yelping and screaming, and all of a sudden the man walks back into the bar and goes "so where's the old lady that needs the tooth pulled"

    :grin: :grin:
  2. :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: Nice one!
  3. ha, didnt expect that! :grin:
  4. A man walked into a bar

    They called the ambulance....
  5. It's past your bedtime mister..........

    Off you go...
  6. 3 men walk into a bar.

    One of them; is a little bit stupid.

    And the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

  7. Two men walked into a bar

    You thought one of them would have seen it.

    A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
  8. hehehe I love it. Hope he bought the dog dinner :LOL:
  9. An oldie but a goodie. When I first heard it (around 30 years ago), it was in Alaska, and it was a Barmaid and and a Grizzly Bear, not an old lady and a pitbull......
  10. but wouldn't a Grizzly bear want to eat you? :wink: :LOL:
  11. a man walks into a bar and says ow.

    a fish swims into a walla and says dam.
  12. A bloke walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!" he gulps it down and says, "Give me another beer before problems start!" This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the barman is totally confused and asks, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"
  13. My favourite:

    "So this baby seal walks into a club..."
  14. a man runs into a bar and is huffing and puffing as he gets to the counter so the bar tender gets him a beer and asks why are you so flustered. the guy sculls the beer and goes i was just at the bar up the road and couldn't pay for the beer and the guy chased me down the street.
  15. I'll second that! Love the baby seal jokes.
  16. lol nice one by itself the seal one was funny as hell :LOL:
  17. A termite walked in and said, "Where's the bartender?"
  18. A baby seal walks into a pub and the bartenders goes "So what'll you have?"

    The baby seal replies "Anything but a Canadian Club"