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Let the Kiwi jokes begin

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by jd, Mar 28, 2008.

  1. http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2008/03/28/2201791.htm?section=justin

    :shock: :? :LOL:

  2. I just read that story too. What a shocker, I mean, a Kiwi talking Australian, that is outrageous!
  3. I'm more worried that he could think a wombat would go so low as to **** a kiwi! :LOL:
  4. :LOL: :rofl:

    What is the world coming to? This is just retarded :LOL:
  5. couple of years old but...

    Top 10 reasons to enslave New Zealand

    1. Why not?

    2. They started it. The Kiwi's have already occupied Bondi. What makes you think they're planning to stop there?

    3. But what about the ANZAC spirit? Yes, well, what about it? In World War 2 when Australia was fighting for survival against the Japs where exactly were the Kiwis? They were in North Africa helping the Poms...err, thanks mate.

    4. Economic bounty: the wealth of an entire, practically defenceless nation awaits us (see 9 & 10). And after the plunder – New Zealand’s entire economic output for centuries to come. ChaChing!

    5. Slaves have a million uses.

    6. Benefits to humanity. A quasi-human population (ie the Kiwis) available for unfettered medical experimentation would be a boon to research.

    7. New Zealand should always have been part of Australia. We offered them membership in the Commonwealth in 1901 and they turned us down. It’s time to remind them that Aussies know how to hold a grudge.

    8. If the US can invade Iraq and turn it into its own Middle Eastern oil-laden fun park, we see no difficulty in turning New Zealand into our own slave-filled South Pacific playground.

    9. New Zealand bases her defence policy on one simple fact: no one can attack New Zealand without going through Australia first. This is generally true but there is, of course, one exception…Australia. This deluded policy caused them to dangerously weaken their armed forces (see 10) because they believe we would never take advantage of their defencelessness. Such trusting innocents, the Kiwis.

    10. Question: Which has the better chance of stopping an Aussie F-111 bombing raid on Aukland, the Kiwi airforce or a flock of their beloved sheep? Answer: they both have an equal chance (ie none). Why? Because New Zealand disbanded its combat airforce in the late 90s. Bombs away!
  6. Kiwis just want to become australian and often think about animals
  7. I wonder if it is the same wombat that has been known to knock certain Netriders off their bikes????? :LOL: :LOL: :LOL: :LOL:
  8. A good Maori friend of mine likes to sing:

    When you see two black feet
    Walking down Bondi Beach
    That's A Maori!

    You can guess the tune.


    In school in NZ a student who had overheard two Indians in the playground asked his teacher, "Sir, what's a Hindu?"

    His teacher replied, "It lays iggs. Why?"

    :) :)