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Lada powaaaaaa

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by South FrenchGirl, Nov 1, 2007.

  1. In france there is some people who drive a kind of 4x4 : Lada Niva...

    these are russian 4x4 .... and it's not good quality

    Therefore, there is a lot of jokes about these cars (just like blondes)

    Question : Why is there heat on the glass rear of the LADA?
    Answer : In order not to freeze your hands when you push it(in winter)!

    Question : How to double the price of a LADA?
    Answer : Making full fuel!

    (Q) What is the maximum acceleration of a LADA?
    (A) 9.81 m / s ²

    if you like it, i will continue!
  2. (Q) What is the additional pedal on the LADA?
    (A) A inflating airbag

    (Q) How you recognize a lada sport?
    (A) At the tennis ball on the towing ball.

    (Q) Why factories Lada will always get the hilltops?
    (A) To ensure that customers can at least roll 200 meters with

    (Q) What is the difference between LADA and AIDS?
    (A) Try to pass a LADA.

    (Q) Why can not drain oil for Lada?
    (A) Because we had no time to use the oil burn

    (Q) How many people can you put in a Lada?
    (A) It depends on the power of the tow truck

    (Q) Why are therel two exhaust outlet on a LADA?
    (A) In order to provide a wheelbarrow.

    (Q) What is a Lada on the hill?
    (R) A miracle!
  3. sorry, double post...
  4. Sadly, Cecile, the Lada also came to Australia for a short time, and we had the chance to experience the fruits of the glorious Russian Revolution as well. Thankfully most of them have disappeared :LOL:.
  5. it did? Under what name?
  6. Um, Lada Niva. My mate's Dad had one. Sure, it was a p.o.s., but when it worked, it worked well.
  7. Lada were here for quite a while. The Niva was meant to be OK. Rough but capable 4WD and reasonably reliable.

    They also brought in two other cars. One was a Russian version of the latter Fiat Bambino. Rough and gutless were the best ways to describe it. horizontally opposed twin from memory. There weren't enough sold to form any real bad opinions of them. They weren't that much worse then what was being sold in the "micro" car class at that stage.

    The real horror story was Samara (spelling?). These were a small, wedgey car that was gutless and very, very unreliable. A fair few sold, because they were so cheap. 5 years later you couldn't find one to save your live.

    Niva=eclectically OK
  8. Yeah the Lada Niva (or VAZ 2121) was actually imported to, and modified for, Australia by Peter Brock. Somehow though I don't think they'll increase in value like Brock Commodores :LOL:.
    They weren't that bad though given that they did what they were designed for rather well and the FIAT engine was certainly reliable, it's just the stuff attached to the engine that was the problem. Actually considered buying one a while ago till the owner told me about how they'd managed to finally "fix" 5th gear - the gearbox had never been aligned properly to the engine at the factory :shock: (and apparently Brock's import company wasn't too willing to deal with warranty issues). There were "factory" convertibles available too which were modified here - though by the looks of those I think they were made by blind monkeys with angle grinders.
  9. :rofl: @jd
  10. :LOL: a couple of those arnt to bad. Well they are nearly the equivilant of a blonde joke, but nothing is ever going to beat a lame blonde joke :!:
  11. haha
    my freind used to have a lada... ahhh not too sure on the model but it looked like a mini suzuki vitara... kinda
    he had a sticker on it saying " Lada goes harder" it was slow but it started every morning and went alright
  12. I remember way back when in UK they did a review of all the small 4x4's and although no one liked the Niva it was the one that they used to pull all the Suzuki's etc out of the mud.

    I think the conclusion was that of them all if you actually had to take them off road the Lada was the one to have.
  13. Keep in mind the design brief for the Niva was for it to carry 4 fully equipped soldiers over unmade roads/tracks at 80kph and be made cheap - something it accomplished quite well.
    It's actually a shame really that the current car market seems to be dictated by idiots who seem to think that a new vehicle should be capable of doing everything - instead of having much cheaper specialised cars, particularly 4wds (sick to death of ads claiming 4wds can go anywhere offroad and yet still "have the performance and handling of a sportscar" :roll:). It's this "must do everything" kind of thinking that I reckon killed off cars like the Brumby, Niva, early Suzuki 4wds etc. which were absolutely brilliant off-road and, more importantly, were cheap to buy and run.
  14. lol. the first car i drove was a lada
  15. anyone want to buy one? my gf's stepdad has one for sale on carsales. 150,000k's for $1750
  16. Haha I've pushed one of those shitboxes about a kilometre. Rolling turds.
  17. Had the pleasure of working on a couple of these. Not fond memories that's for sure. :p
  18. Depends on the driver to a large extent, but yeah, they do go surprisingly well off-road. I watched some nutter drive one up a crazy track once. He got stuck right near the top, got scared and put the clutch in - ended up sideways across the track, and chewed a diff gear trying to get out. The track is about 250m long and is insanely steep, the guys who winched him up had a lot of trouble.

    Pretty funny, but I've seen guys in moderately modified jeeps and patrols attempt that same track and only get half as far as he did. It's still fun to bag them though :p
  19. Well, the Lada Niva did have a couple of things going for it.

    A 4WD mag said it was a pretty good offroader due to the combination of comparitively light weight, short wheel base and the fact that you could hose it out at the end of the trip without having to worry about the upholstry.

    It is also one of the few modern cars to come with a crank start as an option.