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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by pvda, Jun 15, 2005.

  1. Charismatic: Only one. Hands are already in the air.

    Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against spirit of darkness.

    Baptists: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

    Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

    Presbyterians: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings
    the potato salad and fried chicken.

    Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the
    old one was.

    Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

    Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favour of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if
    in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or
    compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service in which we will explore a number of light
    bulb traditions, including: incandescent, fluorescent three way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid
    paths to luminescence.

    Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light
    bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and
    a covered dish.

    Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

    Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

    Amish: What's a light bulb?
  2. Seventh Day Adventists: None, no ligh transfusians allowed :D
  3. Ahhh sorry V_quixotic just a little bit wrong there, Seventh Day Adventists will not change a light bulb on Saturdays, Jehovah's Witnesses will not allow light transfusions.
    And one more; Scientolgists wouldn't have light bulbs in the first place, they thrive on darkness.
  4. What goes "clip clop Bang! clip clop"?


    An Amish drive-by