actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays: 1. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up. 2. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever. 3. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree. 4. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't. 5. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup. 6. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze. 7. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. 8. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do. 9. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something. 10. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.