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Great composers

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by River, Jun 15, 2006.

  1. Hey guys and girls a friend just sent me this joke. Hope you like it!!! :) :)

    Stephen Spielberg is casting for a new film based around the great composers.

    To give the film a twist and some "oomph" he decides to cast great action heroes of today in the leading roles.
    He calls Sylvester Stallone, Arnie Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis and Steven Seagal into his office to hear who they would like to play:

    "Well," began Stallone, "I've always admired Mozart. I would love to play him."

    "Chopin has always been my favourite, and my image would improve if people saw me playing the piano" says Willis. "I'll play him."

    "I've always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes," says Seagal. "I'd like to play him."

    "Splendid", says Spielberg, very pleased with these choices.

    Then,turning to Schwarzenegger, he asks, "Who do you want to be, Arnold?"

    So Arnold says ....

    Wait for it, it's a beauty..........

    " I 'LL BE BACH......"
  2. *Cringes*

    That was fantastic, I love cringe inducing jokes.
  3. :LOL:

    A man advertises for a string trio to play at a small intimate party.

    Next day the doorbell rings, and on opening the door he is confronted by two dogs and a cat. He goes to shoo them away when the first dog speaks.
    "Hey, we're your string trio..."
    Stunned, the man asks; "Ok, who are you??"
    "I'm Bach", the first dog replies
    "And you?", he asks the second dog.
    "Oh", the second dog replies, "I'm Offenbach."
    "And what about you, cat?", the man asks.
    "Oh, you probably haven't heard of me", the cat replies; "I'm just Debussy!"
  4. Hah!

    What's Mozart doing these days??


    Slightly more cringeworthy:

    What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

    A flat miner!!! (A-flat minor)

    (Apologies to Brant & Todd)