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God I'm a goose

Discussion in 'General Motorcycling Discussion' started by Notrossi, Oct 8, 2016.

  1. I think some of you may get a giggle out of this and some will roll their eyes. I debated coming clean with my mates let alone a public forum but I guess we all need something to read on the dunny so here goes.
    I posted in another thread yesterday that I've prettied up my ride somewhat this week....painted fairings, brakes etc blah blah blah.
    Also today was my debutant ride in my new leather race suit cos I'm such a fakken expert rider now.....geez I'm fast and awesome on the motorcycle eh.
    Jumped on my bike at 5:20 am ready for take off. Bloody hell. Can't operate gear lever in my new Battlefield Earth race boots. Off bike. Adjust lever. Sweet.
    Bike won't start.
    Bike still won't start.
    Bike stand down, jump off, walk into garage to grab some tools.....BIKE FALLS OVER INTO BOAT TRAILER.
    Big ass crease in my tank.....she's rooted. Text to mate " fkn dropped the bike c word won't start"
    Check all connections, unplug battery, fuses, fuel cut off dooverwackythingy, fairings off, check all plugs and connections, check clutch and side stand switches. No go.
    My mate rides 30 minutes to my place armed with panniers full of tools.....my bike is in bits strewn all over the driveway.
    Google " 2003 gsxr 600 won't start"
    All day my mate thinks it's hilarious to hit the switch every chance he gets. My misses thinks I'm a moron.


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  2. I spent an anxious couple of minutes in Healesville once when still on my L plates due to the same oversight.
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  3. Not Rossi. Some days shit happens. Hang in there . I had a good laugh only because I have done some similar.
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  4. Did the exact same thing myself the morning of a long ride. Was just about to hand over the bucks for a new battery when i had the thought....kill switch?? Yep, kill switch
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  5. Dayam!

    Done the kill switch thing, it's a right of passage :)
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  6. NOOOOOOO!!!! Your poor beautiful beautiful bike :cry:
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  7. Take heart...you won't do it again anytime soon.
    In my student days I had an old corolla with an under dash kill switch...car load iof friends and I went off campus for lunch between lectures, get back in car to go back won't start...they walked back and I rang NRMA. 2 hour wait and five second job...yup..the friggin kill switch:asshat:
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  8. Bummer about your tank but yeah, the rest is funny, we've all been there, done that, when I first got my Boulevard home I could not get it to start for love nor money, ignition on but nothing else, not wanting to appear stupid I spent 20 mins checking everything - was just about to admit defeat and ring the dealer when it dawned on me to pull the clutch in (none of my previous bikes needed this as they were kick start)
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  9. thanks for the giggles
  10. C'mon on man.......that's taking it too far.
  11. Shouldn't that be Tanks for the giggles
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  12. OF COURSE!!
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  13. At least when I've forgotten about the kill switch I haven't pulled the bike apart. You poor bastard.
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  14. Seriously, you pulled the bike apart??!?!

    Holy shit man.


    Don't do that again.
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  15. Buy a late model big BMW....the kill switch is also the start switch so this can't happen to us...
  16. You poor bastard, the kill switch I've done, I had my last bike fall over and land on my car, but both at the same time is just cruel.

    My list is;
    • Kill Switch
    • Fuel in tank ?
    • Fuel tap (if you have one).
    • clutch in or faulty clutch interlock.
    • kick stand interlock.
    • Battery
    • Has some cucksocker drawn a big line down the side of the plug with a carpenters pencil shorting the spark to the block. I damn near died of exhaustion kicking and kicking in 40 degree heat in all my gear........
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  17. That brings back memories.

    Long ago and far away my soon to be missus and I were working our uni holidays in Germany. We were each working in youth hostels. Mine was brand new and purpose built, like a three star hotel. Hers was a pukka 12th century castle stuck up on a fecking great big cliff over a little village.

    Anyway I got lucky and my roommate would lend me his brand new Honda CB250 so I could go and visit my beloved on my days off. You can guess where this is going.

    So one visit it persisting down with rain and we met for some reason in the village. When I came back to the bike t wouldn't start. Being a BSA owner I just assumed it had got too wet. I needed to dry it out. So I pushed about a kilometre out of town to the start of the steep incline up to the castle. I then pushed it up another kilometre of incline to the castle and into the dungeon. 2 hours with a hairdryer later, it still won't go. (a bit of a record for blow job, I reckon). This failed, I thought I'd try bump starting it, so took off down the incline again, without luck!

    I decide that it's time to fess up to my roommate I have stuffed his bike, so give him a call. I'd been in Germany about 3 weeks at this point and my German was at a rudimentary stage but he spoke good English. You can guess what was the first question. Kill switch? Why would you need a switch to make it stop? Hello, BSA owner here, we spend our lives try to make the bloody bike start!. Once it's running we tend to leave them running all night and just jump on in the morning. That's ridiculous of course, they would have overheated by then. Anyway, eventually I seek and locate the enormous red button on the right hand handlebar, flick it over, press the electric start and......vroom. I rode all the way home on the wrong side of the road in celebration.

    So mate, been there, done that. You will laugh about it later.
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  18. image.

    Schloss Bilstein! I told you it was a big hill.
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  19. It does not matter how many times you press the info button just above the start button on a Thunderbird it will not start it
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