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Friday Funny - Questions, Questions, Questions

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by pvda, Jul 19, 2007.

  1. A mother is driving her 7 year-old daughter to her friend's house for a play date when the little girl asks "Mommy," how old are you?"

    "Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother replies sweetly. "It's not polite."

    "OK", the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"

    "Now really," the mother says, a bit less sweetly. "Those are personal questions and are really none of your business."

    Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?"

    "That's enough questions, young lady, honestly!" mom says as her daughter is getting out of the car. The exasperated mother drives away as the two friends begin to play.

    "My Mom won't tell me anything about her," the little girl says to her friend.

    "Well," says the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license, it's like a report card, it has everything on it."

    Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."

    The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?"

    "I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."

    The mother is past surprised and shocked now. "How in heaven's name did you find that out?"

    "And," the little girl says triumphantly, "I know why you and daddy got
    a divorce."

    Now mom's getting mad. She says, "Oh really? And just why is that, young lady?"

    "Because you got an F in sex."
  2. And you get an F in 'Knowing what day it is'!

  3. I will hurt you on Saturday.
  4. Sweet! You're coming up!

    Hurt me??? Hahahahaha not likely. Alcohol will have taken me beyond the concept of your foolish, mortal "pain".

    Besides, I'm pretty sure I'm providing you [& the GF?] with a bed.
  5. Awesomeness. Bed, floor, whatever :).

    Just me though, the Amazon is not freezing in Thailand.