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Friday Funnies: Strictly Mathematical

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by glipschitz, Jul 1, 2005.

  1. From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

    What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

    Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

    A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


    8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


    11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%


    1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%


    2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

    AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

    1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

    So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.
  2. HAHAHA that's Golden!!! Reminds me of the Girls are Evil joke:

    Proof that girls are evil

    First we state that girls require time and money:

    Girls =Time * Money

    As we all know "time is money"

    Time = Money


    Girls = Money * Money (Money^2)

    And because "money is the root of all evil";

    Money = SQRT Evil


    Girls = (SQRT Evil) ^2

    and we are forced to conclude that:

    Girls = Evil

    Original: Girls are Evil