Welcome to Netrider ... Connecting Riders!

Interested in talking motorbikes with a terrific community of riders?
Signup (it's quick and free) to join the discussions and access the full suite of tools and information that Netrider has to offer.

For those who enjoy the languages

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by Guest, May 15, 2006.

  1. FOR THOSE WHO ENJOY LANGUAGE ( or Severe Distortions thereof: )

    a.. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

    b.. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before

    c.. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.

    d.. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

    e.. Those who jump off a bridge in Paris must be in Seine

    f.. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

    g.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

    h.. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

    i.. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

    j.. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

    k.. When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

    l.. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

    m.. Definition of a will: A dead give away.

    n.. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

    o.. She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

    p.. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

    q.. If you don't pay your exorcist, you'll get repossessed.

    r.. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

    s.. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

    t.. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

    u.. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.

    v.. Every calendar's days are numbered.

    w.. A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.

    x.. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

    y.. A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

    z.. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

    aa.. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

    ab.. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

    ac.. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

    ad.. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
  2. Grooooan.

    I'm showing Chengaleng, she'll love these.
  3. very clever :grin: :grin:
  4. that is outstanding.

    Love the exorcist one. And the definition of a will being a dead give away.

  5. :LOL: Very humourous Bikie,love playing with words,tis a dying art seems, with bout a billion distractions we have nowdays,do it with licence plates of cars on long rides and make up names from the 1st 3 characters of the licence plates.
    That post reminds me of some of the captions on the scroll bar from CNNN on the chaser network.
    My personal fav and only one I can remember
    "Lonely tumbleweed,searches for lost roots"
    But this is a classic
    u.. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under