That's right - and I did before breafast. So now I plan to kick back and take the rest of the day off. Before I'd taken the first slurp of coffee, without even a mouthful of weeties, I worked out how we're going to save this country from the problem that's plagued it for centuries. Here we are on the driest continent, in the middle of the worst drought since that last worst drought and our politicians are running around like headless chooks - recycled water, treated water, storm water, artesian water, water that flows uphill - a thousand complex and expensive solutions, and, in an epiphany, I found the answer that none of them could see. I split my time between my house and that of my girlfriend. My house is set up for me and my two kids, who live with me about 3 nights a week. My girlfriend also has two kids, both girls. I'm not suggesting for a moment that gender is an important issue - but you'll draw your own conclusions. My bathroom has 1 bar of soap, a scrubbing brush and a razor. End of story. You want to wash your hands? Soap. You want to wash your hair? Soap. You want to wash your spanners? Soap. Easy. (If you're going to wash spanners, I recommend washing your bolts at the same time. And your nuts) Her shower has thirteen - yes, thirteen - bottles of sweet-smelling goop. Shampoo for straight hair. Shampoo for brittle hair. Shampoo for hair that's been damaged by the over-use of shampoo. Conditioner for same. Exfoliant (is that like Agent Orange?) Black-head scrubber. Cuticle scrubber. Scrubber I met last week at a party (oops - where did that come from?) Rejuvenator for over-40s who want to look 16. Aging lotion for under 16's who want to buy alcohol. And body wash - which seems to be just like soap that's been left overnight in the bath and gone slimy. And that's just the shower. The bathroom bench has another 11 bottles of equally mysterious stuff. Parabens, emulsifiers, Ammonium Lauryl Sulfate, Cocamide DEA, ammonium xylenesulfonate, propylene glycol, 2-bromo-2-nitropropane-1,3-diol, disteardimonium chloride. So how is soap going to save Australia? The amount of water you use is directly proportional to the time you spend in the shower, and roughly proportional to the time you spend at the bathroom bench. Every extra bottle of goop you need to sort through - just to find something to wash yourself with - means that shower runs a few seconds longer. And that list of ingredients - phew - what a mouthful. I guess I have to read it, why else would the manufacturers put it there? And what if I find something unexpected - like foetal stem cells or powdered rhinocerous horn? That tiny print through bleary eyes means more precious H20 sloshed down the plughole. Multiply that by the number of people in the household, and by the number of showers thay take, and you'll see that every day we waste enough water the fill Sydney Harbour. (Which is a stupid measure, because it's already full). If the Government had any guts, they'd announce a shampoo amnesty. Hand in your plastic bottles, get soap in return. And don't tax water - tax soap alternatives. They're the real villain. Every extra bottle of this stuff in your bathroom is taking water out of the mouths of our children. Do the right thing. Invest in soap.