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BMW R 1200 GS test ride inquiry

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' at netrider.net.au started by Mouth, Dec 9, 2009.

  1. From: Peter Conner
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 09.17am
    To: David Thorne
    Subject: R 1200 GS

    Hello David,
    Thankyou for your recent enquiry regarding pricing of the R 1200 GS Motorcycle. We do not accept household furniture as trade ins on vehicles and would reccomend you sell them privately. The R 1200 GS has a list price of $25,470. Please note that this excludes Dealer delivery and ORC and is GST inclusive. I welcome you to contact me personally to arrange a test ride at a time that would suit you.
    Sincerely, Peter Conner



    From: David Thorne
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 10.03am
    To: Peter Conner
    Subject: Re: R 1200 GS

    Dear Peter,

    Thankyou for responding to the online request I filled out several months ago and your kind offer to allow me to test ride the product before paying what is essentially five times the value of my car. If you could confirm for me that the model is available in desert yellow I would be very interested.

    Regards, David.



    From: Peter Conner
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 10.22am
    To: David Thorne
    Subject: R 1200 GS colours available

    Hello David,
    Yes the R 1200 GS is available in desert yellow. We have a desert yellow demo model on the showroom floor at the moment if you would like to come in to view and arrange a test ride at that time.
    Sincerely, Peter Conner



    From: David Thorne
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 10.48am
    To: Peter Conner
    Subject: Re: R 1200 GS colours available

    Dear Peter,

    I have just been informed that bees are attracted to yellow vehicles. Apparently a few years back, a guy I know purchased a bright yellow convertible and was unable to drive it with the top down due to constantly being surrounded by bees. Do you know if this is a science fact? I am allergic to bees and the last thing I want is to be stung in the eye while I am doing 240kph on the freeway during the test ride. Also, do you know if there are airtight motorcycle helmets available?

    Regards, David.



    From: Peter Conner
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 11.09am
    To: David Thorne
    Subject: Re: Re: R 1200 GS colours available

    Hello David,
    You would be required to follow state speed restrictions of 100kph on the Eastern Freeway during a test ride and would reccomend lower speeds than that until you have familiarised yourself with the bike. We would generally not expect people to take the demo bike on the freeway but we can discuss when you come in. I have never heard that about bees liking yellow vehicles and would think it is not true. The R 1200 GS is available in granite, black and red in addition to the yellow. Would you like to come in today and discus?
    Sincerely, Peter Conner



    From: David Thorne
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 02.50pm
    To: Peter Conner
    Subject: Re: Re: Re: R 1200 GS colours available

    Dear Peter,

    I have been researching bees on the internet for the last four hours at work. When I type "Do bees like yellow" into google, it states that there are 2,960,000 results. It will take me a while to look at that many pages so I doubt I will make it in there today. One of the pages states that Qantas once had a yellow kangaroo as their logo but when it was painted on the tail fin it attracted nests of bees so the logo was changed to red in the mid fifties. This would seem to support the argument that bees are indeed attracted to yellow and contradicts what you have told me. Admittedly though, another page states that bees are technically unable to fly due to their wings being too small for their body weight but I have seen them doing it so this can't be true - somebody should check the internet and make sure everything on there is correct. Regardless, I do not think having to dodge bees in addition to the already present dangers of learning to ride a motorbike for the first time would be very safe. Once when I was a passenger in a yellow taxi, a bee flew in and I screamed causing the driver to swerve and hit a wheelie bin. I will continue my research and confirm that this would not be a factor before I arrange the test ride.

    Regards, David.





    From: Peter Conner
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 03.18pm
    To: David Thorne
    Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: R 1200 GS colours available

    When you say you are learning to ride a motorcycle, do you hold a current full motorcycle license?
    Sincerely, Peter Conner



    From: David Thorne
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 03.40pm
    To: Peter Conner
    Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: R 1200 GS colours available

    Dear Peter,

    No, but how hard can it be? They are just pushbikes with engines. Part of my daily job role is to ride to collect co-workers lunch orders from McDonalds. I balance the bags on my handlebars because they will not buy me a basket. I think that qualifies me for something. Often, I have to make the trip twice when McDonalds® employees leave something out of the order. Actually, on average, every third time I go through the drive through they forget to include prt of my order. Also the girls who work there are too attractive. This means that if I want something from my local McDonalds® late at night, I have to shower, shave and wear something nice before I can get a simple snack. As it takes me at least two hours to do my hair, I am practically starving by this time and therefore order twice as much food as usual. Ordering more food increases the chance of them leaving something out. Last night it was an apple pie and that is really the only thing I like from there. It is quite obvious to me that they do this on purpose. Once, I ordered two big macs, minus the beef, large fries and an apple pie. When I got home and opened the bag, there were two happy meals in there. The toy in each was a Kim Possible figurine which worked out well as I gave one to my son and kept one myself. For a cartoon character, you have to admit that Kim Possible is quite attractive. I also have a thing for Lois from the television series Family Guy so I must have a penchant for cartoon redheads which is vaguely puzzling to me as I cannot stand redheads in real life. Nobody can. I read somewhere that redheads are more prone to allergies and if this is a science fact, and includes allergies to bee stings, all redheads should be encouraged to wear bright yellow T-Shirts.

    Regards, David.



    From: Peter Conner
    Date: Friday 9 Jan 2009 04.28pm
    To: David Thorne
    Subject: R 1200 GS test ride

    Dear David,
    I apologise but we will be unable to organise a test ride for you at this time.
    Sincerely, Peter Conner
     
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  2. Damn hard to get on with, weren't they???

    24.
     
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  3. Gold, pure gold.
     
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  4. hahahah, is that the same guy who did the spider drawing thing? hahah :D
     
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  5. sounds kinda like the spider thing. I must say the salesperson was quite professional
     
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  6. Yah. Is spider guy. :D
     
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  7. Love the Spider-Guy, he's been the highlight of a dreary and politically-correct year....
     
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  8. For some reason I used to be friends with him on facebook. He is the biggest troll ever, it provided much lols.
     
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