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Bike related IRC quotes

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by Ktulu, May 4, 2007.

  1. <kritical> matts: bikes go faster than cars...a bike at 60 mph is a lot faster than a car at 60 mph
    <matts> kritical: um no...
    <kritical> matts: um yes
    <kritical> my sisters sport car at 60 mph goes faster than my dads explorer at 60 mph
    <kritical> a bike at 60 mph will blow by a car at 60 mph

    * xargs should not drive a bike
    <xargs> because...
    <xargs>                        o                _              _                 _
    <xargs>      _o             /_           _  \o         (_)__/o        (_)
    <xargs>    _< _          _>(_)           (_)/<_            _|             _|/' /
    <xargs>   (_)>(_)      (_)                    (_)          (_)                (_)'  _o_
    <xargs> =(

    <guyen> so she gets pulled over, and as the bike cop walks up to her, she asks "are you going to at least try to sell me a ticket to the highway patrolmen's ball?"
    <guyen> then the cop goes "highway patrolmen don't have balls, ma'am"
    <guyen> and she busts out laughing, he finally gets it and just turns around, gets on his bike, and rides away without another word
    <guyen> she just sits in her car laughing for like five minutes before she starts her car again
    <guyen> shit, if i'd try to say something like that he would have gone LAPD on my ass

    <g0atb0t> What's ADD stand for? Attention Deficit LET'S GO RIDE BIKES!

    <Bungie> You know p0rn has become an addiction when you are standing at the gas pump filling your bike and just before you top it off, you pull the hose out and spray it all over the tank.

    (+[CSI]ACE-340) anybody want to buy my motorcycle and then loan me $3500
    (@Ic3x^) what kind of motorcycle
    (+[CSI]ACE-340) gsx-r1100
    (@Ic3x^) erm, not my style... I don't like speed bikes
    (+[CSI]ACE-340) it can go slow too

    <Joby-> so i moved into this new neighborhood right
    <Joby-> and like
    <Joby-> i rode my bike right
    <Joby-> and i saw these 2 hot girls
    <Joby-> and they saw me and they waved at me
    <Joby-> but then i crashed into a parked car :<
    <Mkoll> Real ladies man, arn't you?
    <Joby-> yeah

    Yojimbo: Why do they bother calling them biker chicks, why not just "dykers?"

    <Snow> If Grand Theft Auto isn't mankind's greatest invention, I don't know what is.
    <Snow> I just flew around the city in an Apache attack helicopter firing missiles and random cars. And when I got bored of that, I stole some guys motorcycle, rode 120mph across town to a nightclub, where I picked up $10,000, walked inside, and fired a minigun into the crowd, liquifying everyone inside.
    <Snow> And then I picked up a new suit and went home and called it a day.
    <dano> i love how accurate its portrayal of the 1980s night-life is

    <Du`ranain> I HAVE A DREAM
    <Du`ranain> and no, it's not racial equality
    <Du`ranain> thats fairly unanimous hopefully
    <Kap`n_Kakakaway> one day...nation...etc
    <Kap`n_Kakakaway> is your dream about carebears on motorcycles with chains and leather jackets like my friend ryan's dream?

    * Craig thinks what it would be like if he had a 20" peins...
    <Spooky> You'd have to wear a kilt
    <Villager> you'd need to buy more bin liners
    <Craig> would I collapse if I got an erection?
    <Spooky> And you could never ride a motorcycle
  2. Read them before, but still damn funny, I'm addicted to the same site :oops:
  3. :rofl: :rofl:

    what site's them off?
  4. Not sure if I can say, might be breaching terms and conditions by advertising other websites or some such... Any insight Ktulu ?
  5. The quotes come from http://www.bash.org/

    Where quotes from IRC are submitted for hosting on that database.

    There are some ridiculously hilarious ones on there, but it should be noted that IRC can be totally unmoderated and unmonitored by authorities - meaning: in some instances it is used by people of low moral standards to trade copyrighted materials, illegal pornography and discuss unsavoury associated topics...

    The worst you'll find on that quotes database though is amusing swearing and sexual references :grin:
    I'm just giving some background in case someone figures "Wow, IRC sounds like a great idea! I'll log on right now even though I don't know what I'm doing..."

    Having said all that, it is a cheap and easy way to form a chat community,, it CAN be moderated if desired - and it allows a lot of net social groups to interact entirely wholesomely.

    /end Ktulu internetucation for this morning, kiddies :)
  6. New one...

    #770965 +(208)- [X]

    <@G3_> Half of all adults in the United States say they have registered as an organ donor, although only some have purchased a motorcycle to show that they're really serious about it.