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Best SMIDSY comeback lines

Discussion in 'General Motorcycling Discussion' started by smileedude, Feb 16, 2012.

  1. So you're minding your own business riding along and somebody decides that distinguishing between 250kg of metal and human with the background is just too difficult. They knock you down, you get up again, a bit shakey but alright.

    Then it comes "Sorry mate, I didn't see you".

    What do you say next?

    This is a scenario that inevitably will be said to most of us at one stage, so better to be prepared with a nice zinger.

    Extra points if you've actually used it.
  2. What, you don't see any objects smaller than your mother?
    • Like Like x 8
  3. "Sorry mate, my fist did not see your face in the way"
  4. "Being invisible is my super power, what's yours?"
    • Like Like x 5
  5. I just called the last guy a stupid f**k, amongst other suitable things. He probably didn't understand what I was saying b/c I was screaming like a banshee at him. At least I was still upright and riding at the time (missed me by a bee's willy).
  6. That's all well and good, but now that you have: would you mind moving your piece of shit off my foot?

    (Never actually been hit by a SMIDSY, but the last one that 'tried' got a free mirror adjustment and an introductory lesson in sign language...)
    • Like Like x 1
  7. so, exactly what part of this illuminated white half ton piece of metal didn't you see?
  8. "the only reason you are not going to get pack ****d tonight is that I managed to react and minimise the impact"

    "is there some reason you can't do a head check? I'll be happy to break your neck if you're looking for an excuse"
    • Like Like x 1
  9. if there is a place to get along side them and give them an earful that usually consists of

    "How would you like to explain to my wife and kids that you didn't see me and that your husband/dad is in hospital or dead because YOU DIDNT Fucking look" along with a whole bunch of other expletives

    if not they just get sworn at...A LOT :p
    • Like Like x 1
  10. Last time I said "I'll have to remember that when I squash your car with the bus I drive".
    • Like Like x 1
  11. Mate regains concsiousness lying on the bitumen to find hysterical strange woman holding his hand. Asks in a befuddled sort of way "Who are you?". Helpful third party bystander offers "She's the one who hit you". Mate replies "Oh. Give her my best, won't you".
    • Like Like x 2
  12. In line with what AUS-ESP mentioned:

    "No probs its cool - I'm sure all's good once you've heard the same from someone that just ran your kid over."
    • Like Like x 4
  13. "what were you before you were and arsehole"
    • Like Like x 1
  14. No worries, I'll let your wife know. :angel:

    I seem to recall someone else on this forum saying something along the lines of, "I have it all on my Go-pro, would you like me to show you?".
  15. Damn I don't have any funny retorts .. normally it's just the look followed by "I'm a fat cunt on a bike how the fuck can you not see me.
  16. From paste experience of the two or three times somebody has gotten at the end of my very long fuse -
    launch in to a John Cleese style rant/abuse tirade for 10 minutes.
    Death glare (apparently I scare old ladies and coppers when I'm in a good mood)
    Deck them.
  17. No, clearly you were driving by touch.
    • Like Like x 3
  18. Ladies and Gents, we have a winner (y)
  19. The 'mother' insult I said earlier works particularly well for me being 6'3" and in excess of 120kg ;)