Ok, like most of us there's always at least one idiot we come across on the daily commute - but in the past couple of days they seem to be proliferating like flies on a dung heap. For the past week I've had the loan of a scooter (Sym Citycom 300i) which I borrowed to do the VACC scooter rally and it's been pretty good - write up to come. Drivers generally seem to be a little less aggro about scooters filtering and doing the usual commute and normally give me plenty of space - I do find the regular bunch of commuters on sports bikes steadfastly ignore me but I get a nod from the scooter riders. Yesterday on Royal Parade going home I did the usual filter up the left of the line of the inside lane past the line of stationary traffic and propped up next to and slightly in front of a Mercedes at the lights. Older chap (probably about my age) driving it. Looking in the mirror I saw him looking at me oddly so I was aware that something was going to happen. The lights changed and I took off quickly, easy to do with the torque from a 300 single and CVT - it's kept up with a lot larger bikes up to 60km/hr. Anyway, I hear a great squeal of tyres and look in the mirror and here's the Merc squealing his tyres and laying rubber behind me. Takes off past me in a cloud of rubber smoke and noise deliberately missing me by less than half a metre. FFS - I'm on a scooter! What kudos is there in dragging me off. Anyway, 200 metres down the road I filter past him and another 20 cars and head on home. This morning - heading up Little Lonsdale Street between Elizabeth and Swanston there's a van stopped in front of me. I indicate and carefully pull out to his right and I almost collide with a pair of bicycles heading at speed the wrong way down the one-way street - and I do mean speed, they are going absolutely full tilt down hill. If I hadn't been careful and pulled out carefully (because I know there's often morons doing this - but not usually this fast) I would have hit both of them. So I get to the lights on Swanston Street, they change and as I'm half way across one of Harold Scruby's moron pedestrians steps straight off the kerb against the red a few metres in front of me. I swerve around him and give him an earful of abuse (I don't know if he heard me but it made me feel better). Then finally I'm almost at work, I put my indicator on to turn left with plenty of warning (I know there's a taxi behind me). As I start to turn, taxi tries to overtake and turn left on the inside as I'm turning. I avoided him and he braked. I can't be stuffed getting angry so I just shake my finger at him and point to my flashing LH indicator. Fortunately I can't hear what he's saying but it certainly wasn't an apology! At that point I do get a bit pissed off so I pull up, put the side stand down and get off - he takes off very quickly, bypasses the cab rank he was obviously making for and keeps going. Surprisingly he was an older Australian bloke, in a newish Fairlane, not the usual blind student in a clapped out piece of crap Falcon. I can't help wondering if I'd been on the Beemer whether all this would have happened. The bicycles would have, but the rest of it maybe not! I seem to get fewer deliberate hassles on a scooter but more general stupidity.