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14 things a man can do at K-Mart

Discussion in 'Jokes and Humour' started by firefling, Jul 5, 2005.

  1. 14 things a man can do at K-Mart ... while his wife is taking her time: )

    1 Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they
    aren't looking.

    2 Set all the alarm clocks in Home-wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

    3 Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest-room.

    4 Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: Code 3 in
    House wares!" and see what happens.

    5 Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay-by.

    6 Move a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

    7 Set-up a tent in the Camping Department -- and tell other shoppers you're
    sleeping over; invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bedding

    8 When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why can't
    you people just leave me ALONE!?!?!?!?"

    9 Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your

    10 Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from
    "Mission Impossible."

    11 In the Auto Department, practice your "Madonna look" using different
    sized funnels.

    12 Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say: "PICK
    ME!!! PICK ME!!!

    13 When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal
    position and scream "NOOOOOOOOOOO! It's those voices again!!!"

    14 Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while, then yell loudly:
    "There's no toilet paper in here!"
  2. I love doing the mission impossible one. I got banned from kmart at northland for doing that.
  3. when i used to work at woolworths (safeway for you vic folk) I would often go to different stores like Myer and K-mart during my break just to kill time people would always think I worked there so when they asked where is this and where is that I'd just say oh yeah just head down this aisle and turn left then right, just to fcuk with them.

    Damn I was childish, but hey when your bored on a work break and 15 you'll do heaps of gay shit.
  4. LMAO you crack me up. Those are good.

    Lisa :D

  5. YOU TOO!?!?! :shock: :LOL:

    Altho I got in trouble about ten years ago for that .... :p was at Northland too :p